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World’s First Porno for Plants Not Nearly As Hot As It Could Have Been

With Tell Me You Love Me and Lust, Caution, HBO and Ang Lee are helping to make explicit bonking classy again. That’s all well and good, but what are your houseplants supposed to get off to? This, we guess. Artist Jonathan Keats’s Cinema Botanica is, he claims, the world’s first porno film for plants and features “explicit acts of cross pollination.” (Keats’s previous forays into nonsense include a ballet for honeybees.)

Botanica is six minutes long and shot in grainy black-and-white. We’re not sure how even a fern would find this titillating — better lighting and a seventies funk soundtrack definitely would have helped — but we didn’t understand a lot of things the first time we saw them.

Artist Opens First Plant Porn Theater [Reuters]

World’s First Porno for Plants Not Nearly As Hot As It Could Have Been