apropos of nothing

Boring Witness Shoots Holes in R. Kelly’s CGI Defense

Photo: Getty Images

Yesterday, as R. Kelly’s child-pornography trial was engulfed in behind-the-scenes surprise-witness hysteria, jurors were subjected to the testimony of forensic-video analyst Grant Fredericks (described by the Chicago Sun-Times as “painstaking” and “dull”) when they probably really just wanted to hear about threesomes. Sadly, talk of threesomes will have to wait until next week, as prosecution witness and three-way-partaker Lisa Van Allen has left Chicago and flown back to her Atlanta home and won’t testify until at least Monday.

Anyway, Kelly’s lawyers have long insisted that his image was added to his alleged sex tape using CGI (possibly by haters), but Fredericks testified yesterday that this was unlikely. Walking jurors through it in slow motion, he showed that a mole on Kelly’s back (which Kelly claims is not visible in the tape, thereby absolving him) is in fact visible. Fredericks also claimed that it was “impossible” that anything had been digitally manipulated. Still, that’s exactly what we said the first time we saw Jurassic Park.

Mole defense takes a beating [Chicago Sun-Times]

Earlier: Vulture’s previous coverage of the R. Kelly trial

Boring Witness Shoots Holes in R. Kelly’s CGI Defense