On Friday night, following months of anticipation (by teenagers) and pants-shitting fear (by us), the Jonas Brothers’ new movie, Camp Rock, premiered on the Disney Channel. Like many, we were terrified that massive ratings for Rock would signal the beginning of the Jonaspocalypse and things would be irrevocably changed and life on earth would forever be 1,000 percent more Jonas-y. But, according to Nielsen, Friday’s broadcast drew a scant 8.9 million viewers, and a reairing the following night attracted a measly 3.6 million.
Now, granted, the Jonas’ armies (like all teenagers) are watching their media exclusively on cell phones and Websites these days, so ratings, in any form quantifiable by adults, are meaningless, and it’s entirely possible that Camp Rock could already have been viewed more times than Star Wars. Still, last year’s premiere of Disney’s High School Musical 2 was seen live on actual televisions by 17.3 million people, which makes us believe that if we survived the Great Efron Scare of 2007, we’ll also survive the Jonas Brothers.
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