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Announcement of New Rob Schneider Movie Strategically Buried on Day After Election

Jonathan Horowitz’s Obama ‘08 (2008).

The Return of Rob: Everyone’s favorite gigolo, Rob Schneider, will star alongside Jenna Dewan in Virgin on Bourbon Street. Directed by The Wedding Date helmer Clare Kilner, the sex comedy focuses on a sexually abstinent college student and the night of debauchery that threatens her academic career (to say nothing of her future film career!). [Variety]

Unlucky Number: Ray Liotta and Ray Winstone have joined the loaded cast of 13, the American remake of 2005 French film 13 Tzameti. The psychological thriller centers on a man, played by Sam Riley, who wanders into an underground club in which rich people compete in a Russian-roulette-like game. The film will be directed by Gela Babluani, the director of the original, with a cast that also includes 50 Cent (though he will presumably be edited out in post). [Variety]

He Keeps Going And…: Jackie Chan is set to produce, write, and star in Junior Soldiers, a road-trip movie set during the Qin dynasty. Details are thin on the film’s plot, but it is expected to take place some 2,200 years ago and focus on three people and a horse, because if there’s one thing better than road-trip movie, it’s a period-piece road-trip movie. [Variety]

Killer Chats: The Japanese director of The Ring Two and Dark Water, Hideo Nakata, will direct Chatroom, a thriller about teens who encourage each other’s destructive behavior the only way they know how — on computers! The film was written by Edna Walsh, who adapted it from his own stage play. Chatroom will likely be followed by a sequel, Twitter, in which teens kill each other with sub-140 character messages. [Variety]

Returning Stone: CBS is making another Jesse Stone flick starring Tom Selleck. Jesse Stone: No Remorse is the sixth installment of the TV adaptations of Robert Parker’s novels. This one sees Stone fired from his job as police chief and moonlighting in Boston as a murder investigator. Air dates have not been set, but just ask your grandma in a couple of months. She’ll know. [HR]

Pitt Battles: Paramount has acquired the rights to Battling Boy, Paul Pope’s upcoming graphic novel about the son of a god who fights the monsters inhabiting a huge city. Brad Pitt’s production company Plan B is onboard to produce. The book is not out until spring 2010, giving Pitt ample time to work on his other comic adaptations, which include Black Hole and World War Z, and spend some time with his nineteen children. [Variety]

Announcement of New Rob Schneider Movie Strategically Buried on Day After Election