lame excuses

Jeremy Piven Presents ‘The Sushi Defense’

Susan Mikula’s sic transit 05 (2008).

In the face of the most scorn Jeremy Piven has had to endure since going shirtless in One Crazy Summer, his doctor is now speaking out about the dangerous levels of mercury in his patient’s system that caused him to abruptly drop out of Speed-the-Plow. Dr. Carlon Coker went on record with Entertainment Tonight to confirm that Piven has six times the amount of mercury in his system that a healthy person should have, apparently a result of Piven’s insatiable appetite for sushi. We figured that Piven would’ve cut down on his sushi intake since being banned from Nobu for leaving his waitress an Entourage DVD in lieu of a cash tip, but apparently that incident didn’t break him of his habit of eating raw fish twice a day. Making matters even more interesting, Gawker points out that Dr. Colker is a bit of a shady, fame-hungry diva himself, one who has run afoul of the law and might have abused steroids. After choosing a primary-care physician like that, we can only assume that Dr. Leo Spacemen was out of Piven’s network.

Breaking News: Details in Jeremy Piven Illness [ET]

Jeremy Piven Presents ‘The Sushi Defense’