Yesterday, the new producers of next month’s Oscar ceremony hinted that the show will feature “a narrative line, with the awards arranged to tell a story that will involve presenters as well as nominees.” And the mystery got foggier today, with Academy president Sid Ganis’s vague announcement at the annual nominees’ luncheon: “Your categories are being presented in a completely different way. Heads up,” he told the actors. “Cinematographers, editors, composers. All of you guys. You’re in for a big surprise.” So what the heck does this mean? Will winners in boring technical categories receive their awards in the mail the day before the ceremony? Will all acting nominees be called to the stage, with losers being sent back to their seats one by one, American Idol style? Perhaps this year’s Oscar recipients will be required to wrestle last year’s for their statues? Is there any possible chance that this innovative new way to distribute Oscars won’t be even more lame than the way they’ve done it at the previous 80 ceremonies?