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Week in Review: Are You Professional?

It’s the question that’s on everyone’s mind! Here’s Vulture’s handy guide to determining who was professional this week and who wasn’t:

Bruce Springsteen’s crotch, for we dare not insult it
• Will Ferrell, for saving Broadway with You’re Welcome America
• Lil Wayne, for justifying his weed intake to Katie Couric, dropping a new track, and rattling off a top-ten list on Letterman, all in one week
• Drew Barrymore, for being able to turn just about anything into a hit romantic comedy

• Jessica Biel, for agreeing to host the Oscars for Nerds
• YouTube users Revolucian and Jeffreycoy, for bringing it with their respective Christian Bale remixes
• Jean-Claude Van Damme, for his unfalliable integrity
• Robert Downey Jr., for doing 10 bazillion sit-ups per day
• Oasis, for making an excellent music video that restores our faith in the medium
• Stephen King, for telling it like it is
• Harry Knowles, for taking a righteous stand against gossip!
• Julie White, for telling us secrets about Transformers 2
• Jessica Tohn, for surviving both the American Idol auditions AND a Uwe Boll movie

Not Professional:
• Christian Bale, for reasons that are obvs
• Interscope Records, for not supporting Axl Rose (at least according to him)
Land of the Lost
• James Lipton, for his reenactment of Christian Bale’s freak-out
• Joaquin Phoenix, for his dubious efforts as a hip-hop-star-freestyler
• Etta James, for unnecessarily slagging Beyoncé
• Ticketmaster, for messing with the Boss
• The guys who stole the screenplay for Blart
• Whoever’s hawking the late Florence Klotz’s Emmy

Professionals Who Want You to Think They’re Not Professional:
• The College Humor guys

Professionalness to Be Determined:
• The new, much-debated Animal Collective record
• The possibly homeless folks at DreamWorks
• MacGruber, for re-branding himself Pepsuber

Week in Review: Are You Professional?