Even after all the other awful things that happened on last night’s American Idol — Paula lip-synched her new single and sent “how old is Paula Abdul” rocketing to the top of Google Trends, a tired Gwen Stefani pulled her No Doubt bandmates out of storage to play a rusty version of “Just a Girl,” and Slash blew 25 years of accumulated cool from smoking in top hats with one performance of “School’s Out” with the Idol finalists — Allison Iraheta’s premature elimination was still a bummer. We knew it had to be her or obnoxious Kris Allen, to make way for the Adam-Danny screech-off finale the judges have been preparing us for all these weeks. Even so — why couldn’t it have been obnoxious Kris Allen?
One could be cynical and say she’s better off — fourth-place contestants have the benefit of a week’s worth of our outrage, while third-place ones are generally forgotten the minute they leave, as fans gear up for the finale — but since we actually plan on watching the next two shows (we have to for work), we’d have certainly appreciated one more opportunity to hear the last remaining contestant this season who understood that pointless screeching, or winking at cameras, is no substitute for vocal control.
Maura at Idolator blames Perez Hilton for unearthing last week an old story about Allison being a ringer (she won a Telemundo singing show in 2006). Others are faulting the judges for not better championing her over Kris. We blame the tone-deaf fans of Kris, Danny Gokey, and Adam Lambert, because, what’s wrong with those people?
Anyway, since we’re sure you’re wondering, Paula Abdul is 46. Here’s her performance last night: