Ugh, Super Bowl commercials. These ads, which have become events worth paying attention to by virtue of their pricetags, pretty much provide a master class in what not to do as a comedy writer. They’re full of lazy, sometimes-offensive punchlines, and they all follow unsurprising formulas that we’ve seen a million times before. If people tried to write crap like this into sitcoms, they’d never get work. Or maybe they’d get work on the most popular comedies on TV on CBS? I don’t know, guys. Let’s just look at some examples.
That Guy Got Dinged Right in the Nards!
One of the laziest punchlines possible is the old getting hit in the face/crotch with something. And Pepsi Max really went for it with this one, which featured not only the classic “rich people are such assholes!” trope also seen in Audi’s commercial, but the classic nuts-face combo at the end. People getting full cans of soda whipped at their face was a theme in Pepsi’s god-awful ads last night, as you’ll soon see.
Nutshots can be funny, sometimes, but you’ve gotta earn them. This wasn’t earned.
Pepsi Max: Torpedo Cooler
They Think They’re People!
Animals are adorable, sure, but you need more than just an animal behaving like a person. When your punchline is pulling from such sources of inspiration as Air Bud and MVP: Most Valuable Primate, it might be a sign that you should reach a little higher. And isn’t this like the fourth year that CareerBuilder has leaned on this “your co-workers are just a bunch of monkeys!” theme? Move on, guys.
Bud Light: Dog Sitter
CareerBuilder: Parking Lot
Bridgestone: Carma
Men Are All Like This and Women Are All Like This
Pepsi Max really went for the lowest common denominator this year with their ads, which were apparently created by amateurs as part of a contest. You could blame the people who made the ads, but Pepsi was obviously going for a certain tone and picked their winners accordingly. Both their “First Date” ad and Teleflora’s “Help Me Faith” ad had punchlines that hinged on the groundbreaking observation that dudes are dumb, insensitive clods obsessed with sex.
Pepsi Max: First Date
Telaflora: Help Me Faith
Ambitious Combos
The really ambitious ads combined multiple elements of the above lessons. Such as this Doritos ad, which featured a sadistic guy trying to kill a dog and then said dog predictably beaning him in the face with a door. Get it? He got hit with a door!
Doritos: Pug Attack
And then there’s this, maybe my least favorite ad of the night. You see, women are always trying to control their men! Especially once they get married, when women turn into awful, nagging bitches and men turn into spineless whipping boys. And then when the poor, domineered husband smiles at a pretty blonde girl, that awful woman smashes her face in with a can of soda. Hilarious! It works on so many levels!
Pepsi Max: Love Hurts
One That Isn’t Bad
OK, just so this isn’t completely negative, here’s one that wasn’t bad. Sure, it’s got that sexist ad staple of the mom making sandwiches for the kid and the dad coming home from work, the strong provider, but come on. That shot of the surprised kid turning around is pretty adorable.
Volkswagen: The Force
