The annual Oscar luncheon is always considered one of the most enjoyable awards-season events for the nominees, but it’s also great fun for Oscar watchers, since it culminates with all the nominees ascending a set of bleachers to take one big awkward but glamorous “class picture.” The Academy just tweeted yesterday’s photo, and Vulture has already put it under the microscope to bring you the five best parts. Here they are, from Annette Bening’s insouciance to James Franco’s prettiness.
Look at Ms. Bening, sitting on Jeff Bridges’s lap like a baller. Could Natalie Portman do this? Wait until you’re 52, Natalie. This is what it feels like to do an Oscar lap without Hilary Swank tailgating you!
Chin Beard Guy
We’re not totally sure who this nominee is, but he had better win and make a speech on Oscar night. (And the more beads that are threaded and looped in there, the better.) Can we promise that he won’t get played off by the orchestra, even when he starts thanking Adult Swim and salvia?
Helena Bonham Carter’s Gloves
Really, all of Helena Bonham Carter. Though she’s ostensibly more “put together” than she’s been at other times during this awards gauntlet, she also looks like she is dressed for a funeral where she is determined to seduce her late husband’s 17-year-old heir, and for that we are grateful.
Hailee Steinfeld in the Back Row
Fourteen-year-old True Grit star Hailee Steinfeld is now so tall, she has to stand in the back row with all the men in their fifties. Jeremy Renner spent twenty minutes carefully avoiding the spot next to her on the bleachers. (Also, check out the terrific hairstyles of the men a few rows down from her.)
Part of the fun of perusing the Oscar photo is the sudden blam of a stealth handsome person like Mark Ruffalo in the middle of, say, an entire sound design team. Here, though, we have world-class lookers like Javier Bardem, Natalie Portman, and Cleaned-Up James Franco all contributing mightily to the picture’s prettiness density. Also, there’s Christopher Nolan, who is basically the Brad Pitt of directors. Nice work, these people’s parents!