the greatest story ever told

Michael Jackson, Elizabeth Taylor, and Marlon Brando’s Post-9/11 Road Trip

Photo: Dave Hogan/2006 Getty Images
Photo: Dave Hogan/2006 Getty Images

Elizabeth Taylor, Marlon Brando, and Michael Jackson road-tripped to Ohio together as they fled New York after September 11. Well, probably not, but: What a terrific story! Jackson had performed at Madison Square Garden on September 10, and his BFFs Taylor and Brando had joined him in town. In the aftermath of the attacks, the King of Pop tried valiantly to shuttle his friends away from the city, but when his attempts to charter a private jet were foiled, he did what anyone would do: jumped in the car with two aging legends and drove west. To … Ohio.

A former employee of Michael Jackson’s says that Michael, like General Washington, led his entourage to a temporary safe haven in New Jersey, before the three superstars took to the open road. “They actually got as far as Ohio — all three of them, in a car they drove themselves!” he recalls. Brando allegedly annoyed his traveling companions by insisting on stopping at nearly every KFC and Burger King they passed along the highway. One can only imagine the shock their appearance caused at gas stations and rest stops across America.

Oh, boy, can one imagine it. An associate of Elizabeth Taylor’s denies the story, because of course she does, but it barely matters.

Hollywood, make this movie right now. Stop working on the Three Stooges movie, stop making a fifth Pirates of the Caribbean, and stop trying to make another Superman: Make this movie instead. America!

Liz Taylor, Michael Jackson, and Marlon Brando Star in … Escape from New York! [Daily/VF]

Michael Jackson, Elizabeth Taylor, and Marlon Brando’s Post-9/11 Road Trip