Baz Luhrmann’s Great Gatsby movie will be in 3-D, a previously reported fact that Luhrmann talks about in some detail to the New York Times today. Sounds like money! Luhrmann, citing Avatar as an influence, tells the Times that the 3-D will help audience members feel like they’re in the room with the characters, and cites the confrontation between Gatsby and Tom at the Plaza as a perfect situation to use 3-D. Why stop there, Baz? Here are ten more aspects of The Great Gatsby that we look forward to enjoying in majestic, captivating 3-D. (And, Baz, if you could work out Smell-O-Vision in time to waft the smell of money into the theater, that would help us to feel like we were there too.)
1. The green light, right in your face, coming right at you.
2. Myrtle’s ripped breast, really getting good and ripped, coming right at you.
3. The eyes of Dr. TJ Eckeleberg, staring at your soul, coming right at you.
4. A swirled mint julep at the Plaza, splashing right at you.
5. Meyer Wolfsheim’s tooth cufflinks, in craggy, intimidating glory, coming right at you.
6. Gatsby’s beautiful shirts, flying right at you.
7. The sad, unheeded wails of Pamela Buchanan, representing so very much, and coming right at you.
8. One of Jordan Baker’s golf balls, flying right at you.
9. The pursued, the pursuing, the busy, and the tired, pursuing and being pursued, right at you.
10. The shortcomings and hollow materialism of the American dream, coming right at you.
The list beats on, ceaselessly into the past …