Stephen Colbert Is Back, Ass Tighter Than Ever

In the opening of The Colbert Report last night, Stephen addressed the rumors that have been swirling around in the wake of his absence last week. He’s not running for president or being kidnapped by the Pope, but he is in danger of being awarded the Sweetest Son Ever Award: in a rare moment of sincerity for the show, he sends a message to his mother at the end of the opening. Now we know where he gets his legendary toughness from!

Stephen Colbert Is Back, Ass Tighter Than Ever