Last night on Conan, Jeff Daniels performed his very own “Dirty Harry Blues,” written in homage to Blood Work co-star and Dumb and Dumber aficionado Clint Eastwood. Apparently, the Westerns vigilante truly empathizes with Harry Dunne in the gross toilet scene. Plus: Kevin Hart subbed in for Chelsea Handler and gave his take on the KStew vs. RPattz custody battle over their dog. “I promise you, if he gets that dog by 10 a.m., by 12 p.m., that dog will be in the shelter,” Hart asserted, “Gotcha, bitch!” Also, Joan Rivers critiqued Rashida Jones’s boobs on Watch What Happens Live; and poor Rosie Perez visited the Late, Late Show to promote Won’t Back Down only to get slammed by a Craig Ferguson bombshell. “Do you smoke pot?” he grilled, “You know, sticky icky, the Willie Nelson?” Perez, still as stuck as a deer in headlights, leaned in and whispered, “My family watches this show.” But at least she got to prop her feet up on “the little Tom Cruise stool” before the blow. Watch our compilation to see what you missed.