Christina Aguilera’s song “Your Body” is (very unsubtly) about sex. The video for “Your Body” is — as best we can tell — about having sex, then killing the Adam Levine look-alike (your new music video everyman) in question with a variety of supplies from the local art store. Or maybe Christina Aguilera only likes guys who actually bleed blue paint? There could be a secret Smurf sex ritual going down in that bathroom stall? Someone on Oranum could probably explain this, but Vulture staff are not allowed to consult psychics during business hours. (We save that stuff for the retreats.) Anyway, here is four minutes of Christina Aguilera looking like an X-rated Rainbow Brite; enjoy.