“Commenter winning in the dead of night … ” Okay, and that will be the last Beatles parody of the season. Last week, we had you submit your best worst Beatles parody lyrics for a chance to win the Beatles’ Studio Album Vinyl Remasters Boxed Set. Some submissions were bad-good, some good-bad, some even were good-good, and luckily none were bad-bad. And the winner is …
Well, first, here are the runner-ups:
STUMBLESOJOURN
(In the style of “Drive My Car”)
Asked a Roman what she wanted to be
She said a virgin, from Nazarene
I said, you don’t have to get with me
But I can still impregnate you with the King of Kings
Mary, you can birth The Lord,
Soon he’ll be nailed to a board
Mary, you can birth The Lord
And Catholics will love you
Kyrie Eleison, Yeah!
TWOHUNDREDANDTWENTYFIVE:
(In the style of “Why Don’t We Do it in the Road?”)
Why don’t we do it in the road?
Why don’t we do it in the road?
Why don’t we do it in the road?
Why don’t we do it in the road?
Santa will be watching us.
Why don’t we do it in the road?
GOODTIMEKID:
(In the style of “Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds”)
Picture yourself in a house by the chimney
With cookies and milk and stockings hung high.
Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly
Your mom says it’s time for good night.
Sugarplum visions of cake and ice cream
Dancing around in your head
Look for the man with the fat in his thighs
And he’s gone.
Santa in the sky with reindeer X3
Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh
Follow him up to the roof by the chimney
Where 8 tiny reindeer are ready to fly
Nobody sees as you sneak past the towers
of gifts so incredibly high.
Santa is calling each reindeer by name
They’re ready to take you away
Climb in the back with your heart in your throat
and you’re gone.
Chorus
Picture yourself on a sleigh in the nighttime
With Furbies and Legos and green army guys
Suddenly Santa turns round and he sees you
The man with the fat in his thighs.
WHERES_WALDO_R_EMERSON
(In the style of “I Am the Walrus”)
i am he,
as you are he
and you are me
and we are all santa
see at the mall
with his reindeer pals
see how they fly … youre crying
sitting on his fat knee, asking for a bb gun
red rider pistol, stupid bloody
eyeball, man you been a naughty boy
you shot your eye out.
i am the ralphie, they are the ralphie
i am in a pink bunny suit, coo coo ca choo
ROSIEREAL
(In the style of “Revolution 9”)
Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmastime, Christmas
But the winner is … JPART1:
(In the style of “Eight Days a Week”)
Ooh, I need some oil, babe
To cook these latkes right
Hope you’ve got some candles, babe
For this festival of light.
Mold them, fry them
Pat them, dry them.
Ain’t got nothin’ but schmaltz, babe
Eight days of grease.
Thank you again, everyone who submitted lyrics. Happy holidays and we’ll talk again whenever we have a Rolling Stones parody contest (“I can’t get no Santa-faction”).
