A lot of Twitter users take to the platform to test out their latest jokes and quips, but certain people truly excel at making us laugh with the available characters and constraints. With the Internet being such a big place, it can be difficult to find the comedians most worthy of your RTs and favs. Each Friday we feature one person whose consistent short-form online humor deserves your attention and to be on your Twitter feed.
(If you’re reading this from an RSS feed, you might want to come on over to the website so you can see the tweets.)
This week, we’re recommending the Twitter feed of Canadian comedian Mark Little (@MarkMarkLittle). Little is a member of the sketch group Picnicface who made a bunch of hit videos and the cult movie Roller Town together. He also co-created and starred in the web series Dad Drives and is a busy standup who was named one of Variety’s 10 Comics to Watch this year. In addition to all that stuff, he’s also good at writing jokes on Twitter. Here’s a collection of his funniest tweets:
I came here for 2 reasons: to drink beer and kick butt. I’m all out of beer, and I’ve kicked plenty of butt. See you guys tomorrow I guess.— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) August 3, 2013
Just told my dad I love him and he texted back a pic of a guy surfing — Mark Little (@markmarklittle) September 25, 2013
This might be the booze talking, but I AM BOTTLED LIQUID. I AM CONSUMED FOR PLEASURE. SPEAKING IS NOVEL TO ME, SORRY IF I’M LOUD. — Mark Little (@markmarklittle) February 26, 2013
Hey memory, how bout we make some space for people’s names and clear out some of these “times I messed up a handshake”? — Mark Little (@markmarklittle) October 23, 2013
Life hack: if you’re having trouble crying on camera, just remember how easily love came to you in youth— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) October 23, 2013
Show idea: SNAKES & LADDERS, feat John Snakes & Beth Ladders. He’s a hard-nosed detective, and she’s a collection of ladders named Beth.— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) October 20, 2013
I knew Elliott Smith wrote about drugs, but I didn’t realize “Needle In The Hay” was about dropping your heroin needle in some hay — Mark Little (@markmarklittle) October 25, 2013
Fun prank: put your sleeping roommate’s hand in hot water and then gently pee on his crotch — Mark Little (@markmarklittle) September 29, 2013
“I’m not here to make Friends! Hahahaha jk jk, let’s make some Friends.” - the creators of Friends— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) October 20, 2013
Sometimes u forget that Lil Wayne’s name is actually “Wayne,” & then u think about other guys named Wayne & just laugh & laugh & laughMark Little spent two weeks this summer only tweeting a list of Jay-Z’s 99 problems, and it was definitely worth it:— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) October 2, 2013
Jay-Z Problem #1: accidentally says “not much” when people ask “how’s it going?”— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) August 31, 2013
Jay-Z Problem #4: wants bangs— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) August 31, 2013
Jay-Z Problem #24: thinks we think he’s fat— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) September 1, 2013
Jay-Z Problem #16: genuinely allergic to gluten but no one believes him — Mark Little (@markmarklittle) August 31, 2013
Jay-Z Problem #95: no one wants the puppies from DMX’s litter— Mark Little (@markmarklittle) September 11, 2013