Who Would the Women of American Horror Story Play on Hotel?

Lily Rabe attends An Evening With The Women Of “American Horror Story.” Photo: Jason Kempin/Getty Images

One of the best things the American Horror Story TV franchise offers is strong, empowered female roles for a wide range of actresses. This was celebrated at the TV Academy’s “The Women of American Horror Story” panel in Hollywood this week. While details about season five are scant, we caught up with some of the actresses and asked which jobs they want if they wind up checking into AHS: Hotel.

Gabourey Sidibe
Sidibe didn’t hold back at all. “I’d want maybe the bellhop because you get to bring suitcases into every room. I’m kind of a weirdo and I like to see everyone’s room in the hotel. I’m such a weirdo, like if I pass by this building — I actually have done this before — I’ll look up the address and look up the floor plans for the building because I like to see the way apartments and hotel rooms are laid out. I’m such a creep about it. I’d like a job that would allow me to walk into everyone’s room.” Would she treat guests better if they gave her better tips? “Absolutely,” Sidibe says. “I’m gonna treat everybody horribly anyway [laughs]. But if you give me a tip, I’m gonna treat you a little less horribly.” Make a mental note: Always tip well.

Lily Rabe
Rabe hemmed and hawed a bit as she mulled over various hotel job options. “I guess I’d like to be … oh gosh … they all sound really scary. Coat check — that’s terrifying. Bartender sounds scary. They’re all sounding terrifying to me as I think through them. But being a guest might be the worst, right? Then you’re the most vulnerable.”

Connie Britton
Britton surprised us with her job choice: “If I worked at a haunted hotel, I think I’d like to be the lady in charge of the laundry. Because how horrifying does that sound? The lady in charge of the laundry at a haunted hotel? I mean, come on! What are you going to be dealing with? You’ll see all of it. Ewww! Literally everyone’s dirty laundry. Gross! Awesome!” We think doing laundry is beneath Connie Britton, but then, she’s still Mrs. Coach to us …

Kathy Bates
She’s had her head lopped off and played a bearded lady in her past AHS incarnations. This time, Bates says, “I probably want to lie in bed and have people wait on me [laughs]. I just wanna order room service.” Who can blame her?

Naomi Grossman
The woman we came to love as AHS: Freak Show’s Pepper was very animated when we asked her about this. “Oh God, I can’t imagine we’d see more of Pepper, but I can imagine her: ‘Room service! Hee hee’ I think that would be pretty classic, although I don’t anticipate that happening.”

Who Would the Women of AHSPlay on Hotel?