How to Get Away With Murder
Guys, Guys, GUUUUUUYS! What in the ever-lovin’, Hot-Pocket-in-the-oven, hanging-by-a-thread-button did we. All. Just. Watch? Shonda & Co. got me straight up on my couch looking like this dude in The Scream painting because that winter finale of How to Get Away With Murder was so insane! Y’all, I am not built Ford tough for this. Hell, I’m not built Scott’s one-ply bathroom tissue tough for this. I was so stressed out the entire episode as the tension was cranked up sky-high. We learn exactly how Sinclair died, another death — this time, unexpected — is revealed, and, most important, we find out who shot Annalise. And it turns out I was right! Admittedly, I have, at one time or another, thought everyone on the show did it, so technically, I was only right for one second, but nevertheless, I am counting it as a win and HTGAWM can count last night’s episode “What Did We Do” as a win. What a way to go into hiatus! Okay, enough of me gushing over the episode. Let’s get down to business and discuss every detail and talk about that stunning and slightly confusing ending.
We open with Catherine catching some zzzs, while Michaela, Caleb, and Connor are freaking out about the gun that Caleb found. Connor is convinced that Catherine is the murderer, Caleb believes the gun was planted there, and Michaela is all like, “Let’s get rid of the gun!” Uhhh, how she gonna be ride-or-die for someone she banged once? Unless the sex was so good that when she orgasmed, she was able to figure out what Bill Murray whispered to Scarlett Johansson at the end of Lost in Translation, then Michaela needs to calm the hell down and not obstruct justice for a guy she really doesn’t know. Meanwhile, Frank, Wes, Laurel, and Annalise are trying to decide what to do with Catherine’s painting in Phillip’s photo because it proves the two had some kind of connection. Anna tells Laurel to call Catherine and that’s when we return to the house. Catherine wakes up and sees Caleb holding the gun. We go back to Anna’s office and Laurel tells them that Catherine ran away. Hmm. You telling me that neither Connor, Caleb, nor Michaela could stop Catherine from leaving??? Knowing these Looney Tunes, they probably bought her a Greyhound bus ticket and helped her escape.
Annalise and Wes show up at the house. Because Catherine ran away, Anna assumes that Caleb is innocent and Catherine is guilty. Wes thinks they should call Nate. NO! They need to leave that man alone! He’s already done too much for these fools … like change that police record to make it seem like Phillip is crazy. And while Sinclair can’t prove that Nate did this, she interrogates him anyway. Damn! This woman won’t quit! I know she’s going to die, but she’s still on my screen, so the death has not happened soon enough. Unfortunately, we have to listen to her talking greasy to Nate about how he likes being Annalise’s boy toy and stuff about his wife. Ya know, it’s always the tiniest of women who get big and bad, talking trash in people’s face like it’s the moment right before the paternity test results on Maury. If I were her, I would do all my trash-talking in an Etch-a-Sketch and then shake it up before anyone saw what I wrote. I guess that’s why I’m alive and Sinclair is dead. Moving on. Sinclair taunts Nate and he screams at her in front of everyone at the police station. Yikes.
Back at the house, Annalise tells Caleb he has to choose whether Anna represents him or Catherine because, as I stated earlier, Annalise is convinced Catherine is now the murderer. But maybe she isn’t because Frank calls her and says that Phillip is getting taken in by the police, but that Catherine isn’t with him. So I guess she really did run away. Meanwhile, Asher is trying to get in touch with his dad, who is not answering his calls. Bonnie comes over and gives Asher the bad news: Asher’s dad hung himself because Sinclair leaked the story all to get back at Annalise!!!!
Yet again, Annalise is directly responsible for ruining someone’s life. Damn! And Asher’s dad isn’t the only one. Sinclair has decided to file a harassment complaint against Nate, so the police chief fires him. This sucks, but also Nate’s body is sick, so he can just get a job working with Magic Mike and make more money than I do in six months, so, this actually isn’t a life-ruining situation. Nate doesn’t view it this way and alerts the police that he’s going to counterfile with a racial-discrimination suit. And somewhere, as soon as the words “racial-discrimination suit” were uttered, Al Sharpton put the hot comb back on the stove, took the roller off his head, put on his Joseph A. Bank suit, and ran out the door. Oof.
Asher is with his mom. She’s like, “You’re too calm.gov about your dad dying, plus only his name ended up in the newspapers and not yours for the gang rape, so moonwalk your ass out of my life.” Ouch! Asher’s mom then says she can’t believe he chose Annalise over the family. Are we sensing a theme here? Yeah, Annalise leaves a poop stain on everyone’s lives.
Catherine is still on the lam. None of the interns have called Asher or checked in, but none of them have Asher’s cell number. Then Annalise gets off the phone with Nate and tells the kids that Sinclair is coming over to the house and that Anna is going to tell Sinclair everything. If I were Sinclair, I would’ve told Annalise to Snapchat me because I ain’t going in the dark to meet her sneaky ass after dusk. Anyways, while she is on her way there, Anna needs Caleb to leave the house and instructs Michaela to handle that. Michaela promises him she will stay at the house on the off-chance Catherine returns. Just then, someone pulls into the driveway. It’s … Bonnie and Sinclair’s dead body is in the trunk. LOL. Bonnie gave a holier-than-thou speech to Frank and then five minutes later, she has Sinclair’s body in her trunk. Pot meet Kettle.
We then go back to right back after the first Nate-Sinclair showdown at the beginning of the episode to see what Sinclair was doing before she ended up dead. She says she will drop her claim if Nate drops his and then she tries to convince Nate to turn on Annalise. Like, really? She’s that dumb that she thinks Nate will turn on Annalise like that? No wonder this goofy dame ends up dead; she has SpaghettiOs for brains. Nate, of course, does not take her up on this offer and he instead reports back to Annalise. Later than night, we see Sinclair walking in her office’s parking garage. If this show has taught us anything, folks, it’s that white women need to not be in parks, parking garages, or parking lots at night, but Sinclair doesn’t give a damn and strolls to her car. That’s when Asher rolls up. Once again, Sinclair is talking slick and saying that Asher’s dad dying is karma coming back to bite him in the ass because of the Tiffany Howard case. Well, that may be true in some way, but how about Sinclair not say this while Asher is in a moving car and all she has to protect herself are some cheap-ass shoes from DSW? Guys, I can’t with her because she keeps going! She tells Asher that the world is better off with his dad dead, and that’s when Asher runs her over with his car!! NO!! But at least he’s now about of the murder club with the rest of the interns? #SilverLiningsPlaybook?
A few moments later, a black woman in a car rolls up and asks Asher if he needs any help. I’m just praying she doesn’t get killed and then I remember the show is run by Shonda so she’s not going to have a black character go out like that. Asher says he’s fine and the black lady drives off, I presume, to online shop for more suits that are the color of Jem and the Holograms’ pastel hair. Shortly afterward, Bonnie shows up. She looks under the car and tells Asher that Sinclair is dead. Bonnie then helps him put the body in her car. Yo, he needs to marry her because no one is going to care for him as much or try and save his ass as much as Bonnie.
We then get more background on the Nate-Annalise call. The police let Phillip go and then Bonnie calls to tell Annalise about Sinclair. Anna panics and calls Frank and tells him to take the pills from her office. And yes, those are the same pills that she was supposed to have given Nate so that Nia could die. But the pills are all still there so how exactly did Nia die?! This then leads us back to when Annalise tells the interns that Sinclair is coming over. Asher arrives at the house shortly after Bonnie does and he along with Bon and Annalise, carry Sinclair’s body inside. He drops the part of her body he was carrying, which startles the rest of the interns. Rightfully so, they ask what the eff is going on. Asher fess ups and Annalise is like, it was an accident and we’re going to make it look like a bigger accident. WHAT?! This is insane.
All the interns agree and that’s when Anna screams, “Do you want an A in this class or not?!” J/K, but it probably could happen because Annalise is crazy. She tells them all to shut up and do what she says; Connor gets ready to peace out and as he walks out the door, Annalise goes, “They killed Sam, Asher. Bonnie was just covering for them and everything that has happened is because what the four of them did.”
OMG! Why would Annalise do this?! I mean, I know the answer, but whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?! Hasn’t she destroyed everyone’s lives enough without this Taxicab Confessions bullshit?! Apparently, she doesn’t think so or she doesn’t care because after dropping this bombshell, she yells at them to get to work. Whoa. She then breaks down the new plan: Pin Sinclair’s death on Catherine. And then Frank is gonna drug Catherine and then when Catherine wakes up, she’s going to think she maybe blacked out while killing Sinclair? Yeah, but who’s going to believe this? That sounds so crazy, but I guess when you’re calling audibles like Annalise is, this is the best you can do.
So Bonnie, Asher, Michaela, and Connor are taking Sinclair’s body upstairs. Once on the roof, Connor and Michaela bail. They refuse to shove the body off. Meanwhile, Wes sends an S.O.S. to Nate and tells him to get to the house ASAP. Then Wes goes to Laurel, who is holding the gun. She wants to put the gun in the pool. Wes vetoes the idea and snatches the gun. Great. Now, both of their fingerprints are on the gun. Connor runs out of the house and Michaela chases after them. Laurel and Wes yell out to them and that’s when they turn around in time to see Sinclair’s body crash to the ground. This pretty much puts me off pasta sauce for at least the next three months.
Back inside, Annalise is leaving Catherine a voice mail, I guess to make it seem like she was trying to get the girl to come back home. Speaking of the girl, what is Catherine up to? She’s hiding out in a motel. She leaves her room to go to the downstairs vending machine and just then Phillip arrives and knocks on her motel door, but because she doesn’t answer, he leaves. We see Frank has chloroformed Catherine. While she’s passed out in the car, Frank takes the powder out of a pill, pours it in a water bottle and makes Catherine drink it.
Annalise tells Bonnie to leave the gun and get Asher out of the house. They take the car through a car wash to get rid of the blood on Asher’s car. The next thing we see is Phillip outside the Hapstall house, leaving a voice mail for Catherine. Inside the house, we see Annalise walk into the living room where the interns are and she gets on her phone. ANNALISE IS CRAZY!!!!!!!! SHE CALLING 911, SAYING CATHERINE SHOT HER! THEN SHE ASKS THE INTERNS TO SHOOT HER! Connor is like, “Naw, b.” Then Annalise threatens to ruin Oliver’s life unless he shoots her in the leg and Connor is like:
Right before he pulls the trigger, Michaela jumps in front of Annalise. This freaks him out and he runs out the house, and so does Michaela. It’s Wes’s turn. He tells her that Nate is coming to help, so no one is shooting a gun. So Annalise tries to get Laurel to do it, which makes Laurel go, “Maybe we should just go to jail instead of shooting you.” Lol. So sensible and also the truth. This intentionally shooting people business is for the birds. But Annalise doesn’t care because she is desperate. So when they go to leave, Annalise tells Wes that Rebecca is dead. Anna then admits she has been lying this whole time. Dear Lord, make this stop! This scene is too much, y’all! Wes decides to make Annalise stop and pretends like he’s going to aim for her leg and he shoots her in the stomach. Then he walks over to her and is ready to shoot again until he hears Anna say, weakly, “Christophe.” HUH?
Just then, we are transported to a flashback of a young Wes being interrogated by a cop after he called 911 because his mom … hurt herself and is now dead, I suppose. The camera pans and we see Annalise and Eve?! The two of them are watching this interrogation unfold.
Y’all, I have so many questions: (1) Who in Kris Kringle hell is Christophe? (2) Why are Annalise’s Poetic Justice braids so cute? (3) Why the eff is Eve up in that one-way mirror room with Annalise? (4) Did they kill Wes’s mom? (5) Did he kill his own mom? (6) WHY DO I HAVE TO WAIT THREE GAHTDAMN MONTHS FOR A NEW HOW TO GET AWAY WITH MURDER EPISODE?
All righty, what did you think of the winter finale? Do you think everyone would be better off if Annalise died? And what exactly did Eve and Annalise do to a young Wes? Let’s discuss possible theories in the comment section below.