Remember the epic Comedy Central roast of Donald Trump back in 2011? Comics from Lisa Lampanelli to Snoop Dogg (!!) roasted the Orange One to a crisp, dogging him for his hair (“What do you say to a barber to get that type of haircut … ‘I fucked your daughter?’” asked Lampanelli) to his creepy relationship with his daughter (“The Donald and I have a lot in common: We both live in New York, we both play golf, we both fantasize about his daughter,” joked Jeff Ross). According to Aaron Lee, who has written for almost every Comedy Central roast since Pamela Anderson’s in 2005, Trump said that there was only one topic that was off-limits for the show.* “Each year, the ‘roastee’ has certain topics they declare off-limits,” Lee writes on List. “It’s always interesting to learn what is ‘sacred’ for a celebrity.”
Here’s a rundown of what was allowed and not allowed:
ALLOWED: Jokes about Trump’s hair
ALLOWED: Jokes about Trump’s wife Melania (and his two previous marriages)
ALLOWED: Jokes about Trump having sex with models
ALLOWED: Jokes about the failure of Trump Steaks, Trump Water, Trump Cologne, and other Trump products
ALLOWED: Jokes about Trump’s failed casinos
ALLOWED: Jokes about how Trump only became successful thanks to his wealthy father
ALLOWED: Jokes about Trump’s weight
ALLOWED: Jokes about Trump being attracted to his daughter Ivanka
NOT ALLOWED: Any joke that suggests Trump is not actually as wealthy as he claims to be
Anthony Jeselnik, one of Trump’s roasters, also noted the same thing during a conversation with Joan Rivers on In Bed With Joan back in 2013. “Donald Trump’s rule was, don’t say I have less money than I say I do,” Jeselnik said. “Make fun of my kids, do whatever you want, just don’t say I don’t have that much money.”
Well, Seth Meyers is on to you, Donald, and he’s roasting you for all you’re worth now. Which is probably not that much.
* Aaron Lee has clarified with Vulture that there was no “approved” list of topics — simply a mandate that jokes about Trump not being as wealthy as he claims were off-limits.