How to Get Away With Murder
Time is running out for Annalise. The police have everything they need to lock her up and throw away the key. They’ve got an anonymous source. They even ask, “Now do you want your attorney?” in a really snarky, annoying way. Rude.
Enter the big-ass text that lets us know it’s TWO WEEKS EARLIER, and Wes is being interviewed by the police. The police hand him a picture of Charles Jr., which I’m pretty sure is shoddy police work, and Wes straight-up lies. He tells them he saw Charles Jr. across the street in a doorway. When Wes goes to meet Annalise later, she snaps at him because he doesn’t know that the police aren’t using Charles Jr. as a trap to get him to make a mistake. Wes brings up Frank, and Annalise just says, “Maybe we’ll get lucky and he killed himself.” Frank is not very popular with any of the Keating Gang women right now.
It’s time to meet the client of the week! This time around, it’s three positively insufferable siblings accused of poisoning their mother. Not surprisingly, their mother is a real piece of work and a very serious metaphor. Her hobbies include wearing nightgowns in public and sexually humiliating her adult children. Unfortunately for the Keating Gang, the adult children accused of murdering her are the most unlikable adults ever to be accused of matricide. Because their hobbies include speaking at the same time and texting each other about their elaborate mother-killing fantasies, they’re also charged with conspiracy, so their fates are tied together. Their mother is on the verge of death, which means they’ll be deposed before the trial in case she croaks. So instead of competing for first chair, Annalise’s students need to provide another suspect for the case — and if they do, they get an A on the midterm. Simon notices that the mother is manipulative and lies to everyone. Remind you of anyone? That’s right: $hillary Clinkton.
Wes and Laurel say they’re going to go “gather evidence” or something, but they’re really just sneaking off to gather each other’s panties. Boy, this plot development sure feels earned and makes sense, doesn’t it? These two sure do have chemistry. They’re both worried about everyone finding out they’re banging. As they fall into bed, the camera does a jerky pan out to her living room, where Frank is standing. YIKES.
Annalise is raiding her fridge in her housecoat when Bonnie comes in and suggests that she go to a meeting. At the AA meeting, President Laguerta is talking about falling asleep at the wheel with her children in the backseat. Annalise stumbles in late, because of course she does. It’s like every character on this show is competing to be the rudest human alive. Stumbling into an AA meeting while your boss reveals her deepest darkest shame is what wins you the gold medal in the Rude Olympics.
Meanwhile, Wes and Laurel come back from their “fact-finding mission” with messed-up hair and sweaty foreheads. Rude. Oliver is getting excited for his date that night with the hot acupuncturist. The hot acupuncturist sent him a Bitmoji, so you know it’s real. Michaela can tell that Oliver is really into this guy. Aww, this is going to end terribly. Asher sends Oliver to hack into some of the poisoned mother’s employees’ emails when they find that a busboy sent an article about the effects of antifreeze to someone. They bring it up to the siblings, and the sister reveals that she’s been seeing the busboy. Turns out he sent her the article in the weirdest sext ever.
Any strategy for the siblings is rapidly falling apart because they are garbage humans. Well, it’s time for the deposition. The mother is coughing and interrupting in a very deliberate manner, then reveals that her son is a virgin and jokes that he’ll never get laid. Look who just pulled ahead in the Rude-Ass Bitch competition! Things aren’t looking good for the clients of the week.
That night, the Keating Gang head over to Annalise’s house because Charles Jr. has an alibi and Annalise doesn’t know what to do. She needs some time to think, damn it! Everyone starts talking at once, asking her a million questions. Connor asks if Annalise can be honest or if she’s incapable of being honest so they’ll realize she’s not as smart as she says she is. That’s so bold, it surpasses rudeness. It’s transcendent. Annalise pulls up a damn chair so she can have a front-row seat to the Keating Gang airing their grievances. She gives them a free pass for the next ten minutes to get everything off their chest. COME AT ME.
The preview for this episode made this sequence seem longer, so I was bummed when it was only a montage of everyone’s mouths saying negative adjectives about Annalise. Of course, she also takes some time to defend herself against each student’s attacks. I’m pretty sure you’re not allowed to do that in an airing-of-the-grievances situation.
After day-dreaming about the hot acupuncturist, Oliver talks to himself in the mirror to build up enough courage to tell the hot acupuncturist that he’s HIV-positive. When he does, it does not go well, and the hot acupuncturist bails despite Oliver being as cute as a nerdy hedgehog. I mean, think about it. A hedgehog with tiny lil’ glasses? That’s the cutest thing I can imagine.
Bonnie brings Annalise a piece of cake, which prompts Annalise to say that the Keating Gang will add “fat ass” to their list of insults. I hate to see a woman fat-shame herself. Annalise is watching the mother’s interview on loop, and Bonnie offers a series of suggestions about what to do. Annalise is not listening. Rude. But she is relating to this horrible monster of a human and realizes that the mother poisoned herself to teach her children a lesson. Sure, why not? There’s pretty much no way to prove that, but Annalise “understands” the mother. She tells Laurel that she’s going to try to get the mother to confess during the deposition.
Laurel starts her interview with the mother by fumbling through her cards and pretending to forget which of the children is the oldest. The mother slips up and mentions the name of her daughter’s secret produce lover. Laurel drops the dumb-brunette act, then the mother snaps and says that maybe now her children won’t take her for granted.
Laurel takes everyone out for a drink to celebrate her automatic A. Wes skips the festivities and goes to Annalise’s house to let her know that he ran into Nate at the courthouse. His lie has worked for now, but what should he do when the police come back? Or when the next terrible thing happens? Another terrible thing will definitely happen. Annalise tells Wes he doesn’t get to feel guilty and he should enjoy life while he can.
Frank knocks on Bonnie’s door and says he needs to go to Annalise. He says he planted the gun in Charles Jr.’s trunk to prove she could trust him. Bonnie asks if Laurel wasn’t home. That’s why Frank is coming to see her. She’s his second choice. (She says “sloppy seconds,” but that’s not exactly how they phrase works.) Frank says he needs to fix things on his own, but he’s used up all his chances with Bonnie and she can’t believe him anymore. She screams, “GET OUT,” over and over as he leaves really, really slowly. Oliver goes to Michaela’s apartment and tells Connor that things didn’t work out with the hot acupuncturist. Oliver says he’s being really selfish, but he misses Connor. We just want Oliver to be happy. Oliver and Connor kiss, and my heart swells with joy.
Laurel calls Wes to wish him a good night and accidentally says, “Love you.” When she turns around, Frank is just standing there.
It’s TWO WEEKS LATER and Laurel is waking up in the hospital. She asks Meggy to give her some paper and she scrawls “Wes” on it. They can’t find him, but that’s because he’s at the police station. He is the anonymous source who’s helping to put Annalise away. He wants complete immunity, and he’s going to get it because it’s time to take Annalise down.