It was recently revealed that contrary to the common-sense limitations of hygiene, local laws, and the desire to live free from constantly stepping in hairball vomit, Bella Thorne has 19 cats. (In addition to her dog, whose name is Tampon.) Many questions immediately come to mind, like: Can she actually name all 19 of her cats? Given that many of them look similar, how certain is she at any given moment that she knows which cat she’s looking at? Do they even have individual names? If her dog is named Tampon, does that suggest a theme for the names of other mammals residing in her home?
Maybe Thorne’s cats are unlike other cats. Maybe they line up politely to be counted, and respond to their own names, and provide self-sufficient incomes as #catfluencers. So on the off chance that once you hit a dozen or so felines all living in a single home, it becomes actually possible to keep track of them much less name them, Vulture has some ideas for potential cat names.
Obviously we assume Thorne doesn’t need these names, because she’s fully capable of listing off each and every cat who lives in her 4,500-square-foot home. But just, you know. In case.
Bitch I’m A Cat
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