Seth Meyers was conductor of the analogy-train last night, making comparisons like he was price-hunting for mattresses. Trump spoke out on Fox News after Cohen’s sentencing, and Meyers broke down every way it super didn’t work. Seth said Cohen was the “Ed McMahon to Trump’s Johnny Carson, the Dean Martin to Trump’s Jerry Lewis, the Salacious Crumb to Trump’s Jabba the Hutt.” The Martin and Lewis comparison is a wild misinterpretation of that duo, but Meyers was spot-on when he said that Trump’s legal woes are Randy Johnson and Trump is that bird. You know the bird, the one Randy Johnson made explode. When Trump disappears, however, it probably won’t be in a cloud of feathers. It’ll be onto a yacht stolen from the closest marina to Mar a Lago and piloted into international waters.