last night on late night

SNL’s R. Kelly Can’t Believe We Missed All His Clues

Not that we need to subject ourselves to more of this, but a few additional moments of R. Kelly’s very unhinged interview with Gayle King have just been released, and yeah, he’s not finished pleading his victimhood and marveling about how those freaks at CBS keep all their cameras out in the open. “My lawyer was telling me no, but my ego was telling me yes,” he explains about the need for an interview, unsure of why an increasingly large group of women are conspiring against him with abuse allegations. “You can start a rumor about any celebrity, just like that. All you gotta do is push a button on your phone and say, R. Kelly did this to me, and then attach a video of me doing that thing, and people will believe you, it’s scary.”

And just so Kelly airs out everything he needs to: He loves McDonalds, is totally broke, and thinks we’re all dumb. “Okay guys, think for a minute, use your brains,” he pleads. “Why would I do these things for 30 years! I gave you ‘Trapped in the Closet’! ‘Feelin’ on Yo Booty’! ‘Age Ain’t Nothing But a Number’! And so many other clues! And this is how you repay me!”

SNL’s R. Kelly Can’t Believe We Missed All His Clues