The summer’s trashiest television event is just a mildly buzzed stone’s throw away. (Just, you know, please drink responsibly and don’t scam anyone into an engagement.) The first round of contestants for season six’s Bachelor in Paradise was unveiled on Good Morning America earlier today, and we’re already imagining our dream pairings frolicking around on that Mexican beach. John Paul Jones and proud confetti cake Demi Burnett are destined for platinum-blonde greatness, while previous Bachelor stars Tayshia Adams and Bibiana Julian will join in on the sticky fun. Blake Horstmann, Clay Harbor, and “Always Be” Cam Ayala will also round out the ex-Bachelorette gents, with more of the cast expected to be announced soon. I nominate myself for the bartender.