gone too soon

Egg Was Too Pure for This Terrible World

We wanted more Egg, but we didn’t deserve him to begin with. Photo: Michael Becker/FOX

When Fox revealed the cast of bizarre characters serving as contestants on the new season of The Masked Singer last month, it was clear the show had a breakout star. Staring at us through big, cartoonish, yet lifeless eyes was Egg, and we instantly loved Egg because nothing about Egg made any sense. Egg’s head was an egg, but Egg’s head was also adorned with a hat made out of a fried egg, not to mention Egg’s long white jacket designed to look like a cracked eggshell. Everything about Egg just SCREAMED “I am Egg.” Egg was beautiful.

In last night’s Masked Singer season premiere, Egg didn’t have the gorgeous colors and detail of Butterfly or the badass attitude of Rottweiler, but what Egg had that the other masked singers don’t was simplicity, timelessness, and that iconic egg-shaped face that gets stuck in your brain forever. Thankfully, Egg revealed during a press event earlier this month that the undying love was, in fact, very mutual.

Unfortunately — spoiler alert, I guess — Egg got knocked out of the competition after last night’s episode, and we learned that the man behind the mask was legendary figure skater and Olympic commentator Johnny Weir. Fox pushed Egg relentlessly in the promotional lead-up to the season, and this is what we got in return? Our beautiful Egg, so quickly beaten (pun not intended) in the very first episode???

Here’s the thing about The Masked Singer: Pretty much everything about the show — most notably, the judges — actively works to destroy what’s so fantastic about its core concept. Whether it’s the awkward editing as contestants slowly tease their way out of their masks, or the painfully obvious stuff the judges yell out about clues, these distractions get in the way of what is a beautifully weird idea: minor celebrities briefly giving up their fame to get honest feedback on what is sometimes very mediocre singing, with the added bonus of doing it as some truly bonkers costumed characters.

But the distractions are worth dealing with, because the entertaining elements of The Masked Singer are completely unique, shouldn’t exist, and are worth fighting for — as Egg himself reminded us right up until his elimination. “I’m proof that no matter who you are,” Egg said during his clue video, “if you put in the work and are unapologetically yourself, anything is possible.” That’s the perfect template for enjoying The Masked Singer despite its flaws, and it’s even better coming from a giant egg wearing another egg as a hat. The world was too dark and terrible of a place for Egg to stick around on The Masked Singer forever, but for Egg’s extremely brief time on this Earth, we loved him so, so much.

We’ll miss you, Egg.

Egg Was Too Pure for This Terrible World