In case anyone still needed convincing that The Masked Singer is an absurd, Bizarro World farce of a show, the singing competition eliminated legendary songstress Patti LaBelle in eighth place out of 16 contestants. A failure of judgment on everyone’s part! This week, Patti sat down with fellow reality singing competition survivor Kelly Clarkson on her talk show to address the sacrifices and challenges that went into her run as “Flower.” When Kelly asked what it was like to don that bright purple Dr. Moreau flower-humanoid-hybrid mask, Patti confessed: “I was hot as hell. Yes! It was so hot and so kind of uncomfortable, but I wanted to be in that mask. And I wanted to be in that dress, and those pumps.” Patti added that “at 75, I do things people don’t think 75-year-old women should do.” Kelly sympathized and said in a costume like that she would feel like “sausage,” which is probably giving The Masked Singer costume designer some character ideas for Season 3.
Also of note: Kelly asked Patti about her work on the original “Lady Marmalade,” which seemed to piss off some nuns back in the day on account of the subject matter. Patti told these nuns, “Here’s the deal: You don’t take a mattress from a hooker. Let her make her money … I ain’t stopping it. Work, girls, work!” Not all heroes wear capes. Some wear masks. Never change, Patti.