The L Word: Generation Q
Come through, episode four!
After spending the first three episodes laying some ground, The L Word: Generation Q picked up nice steam — and by steam, I mean sex — this week with “LA Times.” We start with a shirtless-but-covered-by-sheets Bette Porter who, in a very Bette move, is sharing post-sleepover breakfast in bed with Felicity, the married former employee whose husband confuckted (confronted about fucking) Ms. Porter during a campaign event a few episodes back.
Of course Dani, the new cast’s answer to Bette’s beloved self-righteousness, finds out Felicity is still in the picture and uses a case of swapped phones to have a very Deep Throat intimidation-esque conversation with Bette’s still-married beau, warning her to stay away if she really loves Bette. Honestly, Porter/Nunez 2024. Those two are *exactly* matched in their knitted-eyebrow intensity, and I love to watch Bette find a mentee.
Where’s everyone else this episode? Shane is having this-reminds-me-of-that-Carmen-magic sex, but then that turns out to be a dream memory and we’re sadly now awake and it’s morning. Not just any morning, though. According to a bunch of texts, this is Shane’s actual human 40th birthday, and we’re gonna get to spend it with her!
Elsewhere in the McCutcheon mansion, Finley is in bed with Rebecca, the priest she’s been dating, making plans to meet up later so F-bomb can have dinner with a few of Becca’s priestly friends. Clearly from the way Finley is operating in this convo, Rebecca has a slight (massive) edge maturity-wise, but let’s see: Maybe the friend thing will go great!
But first, birthday Shane’s gotta go meet up with Alice and Bette for birthday coffee at the birthday Silver Lake Intelligentsia and then lead A&B, eyes closed, to the new bar she bought, and GUESS WHAT, FOLKS??! The bar is called Dana’s, which is a true delight and almost made me cry. I still see Dana Fairbanks in every rainbow I pass, and if this bar is closed-eye-walking distance from Silver Lake Junction, that means it’s also walking distance from my place, and someone please open it. Fine. I will.
Over at the show Alice, Alice is being shadowed by a reporter who wants to know all about Alice’s work-life balance and accidentally asks Nat’s ex-wife, Gigi, instead of Nat herself. Well, she thinks Nat’s ex is the nanny. Incidentally and unrelated, Stephanie Allynne played my ex-wife on Maron, so Sepideh Moafi and I are Golden Globes, a term I’ve just made up for when you and another actor have the same actor play your ex-wife.
Speaking of soon-to-be wives, Dani decides to unwind from putting Bette in her place and joins Sophie in the bath. Dani admits to Sophie that she’s scared Sophie will leave her — after all, she was with someone else when they met. Then Sophie gets out of the bath, grabs her great-grandmother’s ring to give Dani, and reassures her she’s here to stay. Damn, the actors must have been freezing shooting this. Rest assured, your sacrifice was noted, my dudes. And also congrats to everyone involved with the show for the very flattering ass shot that ends this scene. Tough to get a good ass shot! It’s very well lit.
Seemingly, Dani and Sophie were taking a pre-party bath because before long, we’re at Shane’s 40th birthday and the whole cast is there, but dang if I didn’t spend most of these scenes scanning the background actors for familiar faces. Either for people I know or for characters from the original series. Alas, that was not to be. Alice was, though. Between, that is.
While Bette spends the party promising anyone who wants to ask that it really is finally over with Felicity, Shane passively breaks up the two Dana’s bartenders by being the object of one of their affection (well, and they slept together), and Micah angrily asks his building manager what’s the deal with his hot-and-cold messaging — which is a little odd because the hot and cold do not seem that drastic, but maybe I’m missing some character background we will get soon enough.
An alcohol-fueled Finley leaves the party and arrives to her meet-the-friends dinner wasted and mumbly and insulting, insisting that she can handle Rebecca’s job because she’s “not a real priest.” Though Finley’s messiness is relentless, I actually kind of get it. I mean, I wrote about being an ex-Catholic and attending a service at a church called the MCC here in L.A. for Gay Magazine, and that piece was written and edited before last week’s episode that had Finley, an ex-Catholic, go to a church at a place called the MCC here in Los Angeles. What the fuck? Anyway, Rebecca asks Finley to leave and it’s a bummer, but …
Nothing in the previous paragraph is as disastrously interesting as the fact that Alice, Nat, and Gigi decide to have a threesome that is two-thirds comprised of ex-wives! These three are sexy together, and I stress-sweated through this entire portion of the show. What will happen here, ladies! You have kids! You are ex-wives! AHHHHHHHHH. Ah! However, I did audibly say “Amazing!” when they shared a three-way kiss — like all their lips in the middle. We don’t see enough of those in the wild. Too many television threesomes are, “Your turn. Okay, now your turn,” when they could be, “EVERYBODY NOW!”
Back outside the stress-threesome, Dani and Sophie leave to have sex at home, as a twosome. Micah and Shirtless Neighbor are making out in some other bar corner. Bette pushes a birthday cake on a little cart (I’ll take my next birthday cake delivered thusly) and then Alice, Nat, and Gigi are there too, hair mussed. Just as Shane is about to blow out those candles, her sex-dream person from earlier appears. It’s her wife, arriving the day Shane signed divorce papers, to wish her a happy birthday — and that’s a little show called The L Word.
• Leisha Hailey looks fantastic in yellow. Also, any bold colors.
• Bette confirms Kit’s death by heroin overdose in this episode. There’s no direct through line between losing a family member to addiction and running for mayor, unless you factor in the Bette-ness of it all. Some folks, if moved by the death of a family member to take larger action, would work in treatment or recovery. Would become a nurse. Would work on themselves even. Not Bette. The through line sticks the landing.
• Shout-out to the butch delivery person walking through to hand a package to Jamie Clayton as Dana’s gets stocked. I see your ring of keys, friend.