The Real Housewives of Atlanta
I will say this about Kenya Moore-soon-not-to-be-Daly. She makes it hard to get on her side. Even as Kenya is watching her marriage disintegrate in front of her, she’s making people eat sardines in order to pick their rooms. KENYA. I understand the necessity of joy during difficult times, but could you not? She’s spent the last 16 episodes tormenting Tanya and damn near everyone else over damn near everything and now she wants everyone to respect her privacy during this trying time? I get it. I fully get it. Separating from a spouse is difficult and painful, especially if you’ve built a whole identity around projecting a happy image to your friends and the world, but holy shit, Kenya, you can let someone in even for a second. Also, she’s not wrong to be wary of NeNe and Marlo, but I know I feel like the energy required to maintain a grudge during times of emotional distress isn’t worth it. But I’m not Kenya and she seems to power herself on the hatred she has for other people.
This episode doesn’t feel like a real episode with a story and narrative movement; it feels like everyone packing up their emotional baggage. We all know it’s going to fall onto the sidewalk and pop open at some point, but we’re still holding a lot of stuff in. Let’s get to it.
Everyone is literally packing for the Greece trip “hosted” by Kenya and Kandi when the news starts breaking that Kenya and Marc are filing for divorce. Eva is in the middle of filming a confessional when her phone pings and she sees a flurry of news reports and personal statements about Kenya’s divorce. NeNe calls Marlo to speculate if Kenya’s dress last night was actually Dolce & Gabbana and to talk about how the event was so positive. Except for, if you noticed, Marc being completely full of contempt for his wife in full view of everyone. They know no one is going to tell them anything, so they’re just going to stay out of it.
Kandi and Cynthia are the Kenya emotional support team, so they go to Kenya’s house to check on her. Like every girlfriend duo heading over to support a friend going through a breakup, they stand in the driveway for 15 minutes, get all their shock out, and strategize. If you’ve never stood on a front porch going, “Well, she already told me …,” you’ve never supported a friend. After the charity event, Marc and Kenya had a serious fight in the car ride home and Cynthia says if it was her, she would have been gone. Would you, Cynthia? Cynthia and Kandi agree that Kenya has been accepting Marc’s bad behavior because family is so important to her and she wants to make it work for Brooklyn’s sake. She better take that baby and run.
Kenya is just confused. She thinks that Marc forced her hand when he released a statement to the press about their separation, so she released her own statement when her publicist alerted her. I can’t fathom having to sort out your divorce based on vague statements to the press. Marc also told her in the Uber on the way home that he didn’t even want Kenya to come that night and they got into a fight that scared her. In fact, he was so terrible that the Uber driver kicked him out. Can you imagine how fucking awful you have to be in order for an Atlanta Uber driver to kick you out? That Uber driver risked being zapped by the giant laser operated by the vengeful Uber overlords that is in the sky above us at all times in order to kick Marc Daly out of his car. Someone give this Uber driver a medal.
Cynthia asks if Kenya wants a divorce and just wants to move on. Kenya is … confused. She doesn’t really want a divorce, but she knows that Marc is cheating on her. She’s found text messages from other women who are asking Marc if they can keep the sex going now that he’s married. KENYA. WHY? She decided to call one of the women and got into a screaming fight with the other woman. Kenya, your husband is right there. Don’t get into a fight with a random woman he’s cheating with. Cut all his suits in half. Set his favorite piece of art on fire. Focus your energy. Worst of all, Marc won’t apologize or admit wrongdoing.
What is Kenya holding onto here? When were the good times? Can someone name one good thing Marc has done for anyone other than himself? He gave her a baby. Kenya, a lot of people could have given you a baby. Kenya knows she wants her daughter to grow up to respect her and show her how not to accept awful treatment but … it’s hard. Cynthia and Kandi just want Kenya to come on the Greece trip because they are all contractually obligated to.
It’s time to meet up at the airport and Porsha is bringing baby PJ to Greece. She’s excited to be able to introduce her baby to international travel before her baby is forming coherent memories. I do not understand this woman but I love her deeply. Everyone is worried that Kenya isn’t going to show up and Kandi warns Marlo to leave Kenya alone if she does show up. Marlo and NeNe feel it’s awfully rich to extend this courtesy to Kenya when she was sticking her nose in everyone else’s business.
Once they land in Greece, Kenya mysteriously appears in the distance with her baby and her nanny. I’m surprised Marc is letting her take the baby out of the country, but she jumped on a direct flight and arrives at the same time as everyone else.
The first bit of drama is the room situation. It’s your standard Real Housewives room selection bullshit. Who is this for? Who is thrilled by watching 50-year-old women fight over rooms in an AirBnB? Kenya and Kandi have decided to put everyone through a series of challenges in order to select their rooms. Cynthia has to do the dishes and she gets to pick before the other girls, NeNe takes all her makeup off and she gets to pick next. Sure sure sure. Finally, Porsha and Tanya eat a Fear Factor–style plate of Greek treats in order to pick. And then Porsha jumps in the pool to be able to swap. I’m unclear what the rules are, but Porsha is pissed that everyone has to tiptoe around Kenya while Kenya is making everyone jump through hoops to pick out rooms. I agree, Porsha.
It’s time to get ready for dinner and Cynthia asks NeNe if she could extend a hand of sisterhood and fellowship to Kenya. It might be an easier ask if Cynthia just said “can you fucking not, tonight?” NeNe says that regardless of where they are in their relationship, Kenya is hurting and NeNe might be able to give some advice out of genuine concern. Kenya is naturally suspicious of everyone who isn’t Kandi or Cynthia. At dinner, NeNe offers up her sympathies to Kenya and asks if she’s okay. Marlo chimes in and Kenya goes through how everyone has helped her or reached out and leaves NeNe off the list. Even Marlo gets a perfunctory shout-out.
After dinner, NeNe is fed up. She sees that Kenya has no interest in listening to her, so she’s over it. Kandi and Cynthia explain to Kenya that maybe she could show NeNe a shred of human decency and this whole trip would be smoother. Nene says in her confessional, “Fuck Kenya. To be clear, FUCK KENYA and her bad skin.”
Kenya decides that maybe she can take NeNe a piece of dessert as a peace offering, but it’s too little, too late. NeNe has gotten up from the table and she’s not interested in listening to Kandi tell her to slow down and accept the baklava. NeNe storms off and says “I don’t get ready when she’s ready. She’s always right and I’m always wrong. Yeah, I guess I fucked her man and stole her baby. Keep it 1000 with your friend. I’m going to talk to my man and keep my marriage together.”
There is a volcano brewing with NeNe and Kenya, and it’s going to ruin baby Brooklyn and baby PJ’s dream vacations.