Can you come pick up your boys, Mrs. Cuomo? They’re fighting on national television again. Last night, New York governor Andrew Cuomo made another appearance on his brother’s CNN show, Cuomo Prime Time, and what started as a conversation about Governor Cuomo’s relationship to the president during the coronavirus pandemic quickly devolved into another episode of everyone’s favorite show within a show within a global crisis: Famous Adult Son Bickering Hour. It starts with Chris praising Andrew’s #IStayAtHomeFor campaign to promote social distancing, adding, “I’m staying home for my mother because I love her, and at her age she’s uniquely vulnerable to the virus.” To cement his status as Best Son, a picture flashes onscreen of him hugging their mother. Real nice, Chris. Andrew counters that he “went first”: “The whole campaign is dedicated to my mother, and I said that first thing, when I posted my picture.”
So Chris changes his tactic, saying, “I’m going to stay at home for these two guys,” pulling up a very groovy family photo with the li’l Cuomo brothers up front. Andrew starts pulling his mic out, claiming, “I don’t see it. I don’t see it”; says “bye, Chris”; and starts to wave good-bye. But Chris is relentless, for in the picture, Andrew has a fro, bell-bottoms, and something called a “huckapoo shirt,” which I would like in blue please. Chris tries to talk him down, saying, “Don’t you do it. Put the microphone down; don’t be like that.” Because Chris has the hard-hitting questions: “Tell the people, huckapoo was your signature look back then. You abandoned it. Why?” Andrew shakes his head. “There are no words. There are no words.” You can laugh at these feuding adult sons or read about the governor’s plan to cut public hospital funding and roll back bail reforms. Take your pick.