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Inside Quarantine With Oh, Hello’s George St. Geegland and Gil Faizon

George and Gil. Photo-Illustration: Vulture and Joan Marcus/Netflix

For years, after conquering the prank show, the Great White Way, Netflix, and a piece of branded content with Awkwafina, Hollywood was abuzz wondering what was next for Gil Faizon and George St. Geegland. What else did they have to prove? Well, what was next was a podcast — sorry, a p’dcast — and what they had to prove was who was really behind the death of Princess Diana. Over the course of eight 20-minute-or-so episodes (and a bonus), Oh, Hello: The P’dcast did just that, getting to the truth of the biggest historical event of the last 25 years, or at least of the late ’90s. Working with frequent collaborators/hangers-on John Mulaney and Nick Kroll, the lovable lads from the Upper West of Manhattan just wrapped up the first season that a very smart writer for a very smart website called “just about perfect.”

As a victory lap, the boys stopped by Vulture’s Good One podcast to discuss the podcast, podcasting in general, and how they’re handling quarantine. You can read some excerpts from the transcript or listen to the full episode right below. Tune in to Good One every Tuesday on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, Overcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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On How They’re Handling Quarantine

Are you quarantining on the Upper West Side? How is it up there?
George: Yeah, we didn’t exactly spring for a new home during the quarantine. I wish I had one of those “idiot buttons” you could press. You know, Howard Stern–style — just something like a toilet flushes, something when someone asked a D-minus question like that. “Where do you live?” “Out of a home!”

Gil: But we were hoping to get up to Saugerties or something in the Hamptons or …

George: Just pull over somewhere on 28 up near Phoenicia. 

Gil: Try to get up to the Phoenician Diner — anywhere upstate. Most of my connections kind of fell through.

George: Well, they died years ago.

Gil: Yeah, many of them died. And so we decided to stay in our apartment on 74th and Amsterdam. So we decided to stay. You know, we’re in two different rooms. We’re in a double. We’re self-isolating. We’re in two different rooms: I’m quarantined in one room, and George St. Geegland’s quarantined in another room.

George: We were concerned, you know, ’cause Gil is at risk. On Twitter, that’s his handle — @Risk — because he’s part of these board games where you plan war.

Gil: Mm-hmm.

George: I’m a Stratego man myself.

Gil: Yeah, it’s true. But I’m at risk. And it turns out George diagnosed me; he stuck his fingers way up my schnoz.

George: Ten seconds each nostril.

Gil: It turns out that I got double COVID … And so it turns out it cancels itself out.

On Creating Their Own Podcast

You guys are both artists. Gil, you are an actor. George, you’re a writer. How’s the creative process different when creating a podcast?
George: Well, with the p’dcast, it’s … You get headphones and you get larger microphones than … If you’re picturing a B’b Barker microphone, you have to picture a larger microphone. You normally bring a guest in and you kind of pre-apologize for the p’dcast, and then you record the p’dcast, and at the end you all take your headphones off and you scratch your ears, because they’re a little sweaty and a little itchy. And then you go, “That was great!”

Gil: “That was great! That was fun. That was good. That was fun!”

George: “There was a lot of great stuff in there.” And then we have to go in and splice magic out of their dirt pile.

Gil: It’s true.

George: So it’s different than writing a book, which is typing.

Gil: I think we’re trailblazers as far as launching a p’dcast during the quarantine. We were the first, I think the first, to do it.

George: We were. Yeah, we were.

Gil: You know, you see all these other p’dcasts out in the mix right now: the guys from The Scrubs and the girls from The Orfice and the guys from Community. It’s like, how pathetic do you have to be to try to capitalize on the success of a former show to have a p’dcast on that?

George: Yeah. You had a show once. Congratulations. Move on with your life! What are you providing us? It just sounds like inane chitchat.

Gil: You’re just doing the same characters that you already done, and now you’re doing a p’dcast for it?

George: And at least we respect the 18-minute mark. I don’t think we have a show longer than 21. 

On Their Pandemic Binge-Watching

Did you watch Tiger King? Did you watch The Last Dance?
Gil: Oh my God.

George: Oh, Tiger King. Listen, Tiger King, here’s how good … If you’ve never seen a documentary before, Tiger King is … It’s amazing. They have footage of stuff.

Gil: It’s awesome. And you know, because our show, Oh Hello: The P’dcast, available on [gibberish], we got Netflix to sponsor — I mean, not really, but we’ve been doing sponsorships hoping that some of those companies would pay up. But Tiger King was one of our first sponsors.

George: If you’re still scratching your head, standing on the corner with your belly hanging out thinking about why did Trump win, take a look at these 12 idiots in this movie, most of them criminals.

Gil: We watched Tiger King and we ordered one of those tigers to have in the apartment.

George: Both as cuddler and as a lure, because the guy that wears a do-rag and a baseball cap, he would use baby tigers to lure women in Vegas because he was having a tough time there apparently.

Gil: We went to the same cult school as Bhagavan. What’s his name? Anybody remember it? Is it already disappeared from our collective conscious at this point?

George: You mean the guy who had a hat and longer white hair?

Gil: Exactly. We watched Tiger King, Last Dance. ’Cause we were big Knicks guys back in the ’90s when Jordan and the Bulls were the big squad.

George: We actually … We worked for Pat Riley as his slicked-back team. He would dunk his head in the sink, and we would go “Easy!” And we’d make sure that those beautiful Hermès ties didn’t get any gel on them.

Gil: That’s right. I was known officially for Pat Riley as his pomade wrangler, and George was in charge of making the knot on his tie as small as possible.

George: I was also hired by Knicks PR to make John Starks more unlikable.

On Bill de Blasio

How do you think de Blasio is doing?
Gil: De Blintzio? Well look, we’re Y guys. De Blasio’s catching a lot of heat, but he’s a Y guy. You know, he goes to the Y every day. And so we certainly get him. We see Bill at the Y.

George: And he doesn’t have nice workout clothes. He has kind of a long T-shirt that he wouldn’t wear in life, and shorts, and you go, “I like that this isn’t even a process you take pride in.” 

Gil: No, he’s wearing shorts from Modell’s.

George: He’s wearing the Modell’s brand.

Gil: [Singing] De Blasio goes to Mo’s! De Blasio goes to Modell’s!

George: I mean, listen. In a city that never sleeps, the mayor gets up at noon.

Gil: The guy’s a winner. The guy’s a proven winner. To be one of the least-liked mayors of New York and to immediately run for president?

George: Even Koch did not run for president. And Koch would have been our first openly annoying president, ’cause he was open about what an annoying ostrich he was.

What They Think of Nick Kroll and John Mulaney

It seems like you guys are working with Nick Kroll and John Mulaney again, and they wanted to do it for charity. What did you think about that decision?
George: Cowards.

Gil: These cowards. These human trash, these cowards. You know, we’ve been carrying these two for years, you know?

George: This is why we left the Manson family: ’Cause it was all, “Let’s share, let’s give each other the garbage to eat.” And I said, “What I got, what I jimmied it out of the dumpster, is mine. Comprende?” And I remember Charlie saying, “This guy makes me nervous.” And I said, “You know, fine. Gil and I are going.” And Gil was in a little peasant dress and he had long braids.

Gil: I was barefoot tromping through Laurel Canyon, hungry. 

George: Walking downhill on Laurel.

Gil: And George grabbed me. He was in this awful little VW and he grabbed me and said, “We’re out, we’re not in the Family anymore.” And I had a lust for blood! The amount of PCP and acid that I had in my empty body at that point, I had a thirst for blood. But George got me out, you know? And he got me out just in time, just like we got out of the grasp, the cold-iron grip, of John Mulaney and Nick Kroll before they could sink their controlling little teeth into us.

George: I came to them with a folder I made, a brochure on Monsanto. And I said, “This is one of the major corporations, and I think they get nothing but bad press. We could do ads for Monsanto. I believe they make pesticides and other ways to make flowers smell fruity. Why don’t we call them?” And they [said], “Oh, you know, that makes us uncomfortable.” And I shook up a can of Sprite and I threw it at their heads.

Gil: Yeah. I go, “You know what makes me uncomfortable? The rock-size gallstone that I’m currently passing through my urethra. But you don’t hear me calling that out except for right now.” And then I passed it and I threw it in Nick Kroll and John Mulaney’s face.

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Inside Quarantine With George St. Geegland and Gil Faizon