Reformed teen vampire Robert Pattinson will be donning a tight suit in the newest Batman film iteration, casting news that, when unceremoniously leaked to the press last year, made him “fucking furious.” Something far less furious and more endearing though? How Pattinson tried and failed to secretly audition for the role while filming Christopher Nolan’s plagued spy drama Tenet, which he recalled during a new Irish Times interview. “It’s funny because Chris is so secretive about everything to do with his movies,” Pattinson explained, stating the very obvious. “And then I had to be really secretive about Batman stuff. So I had to lie to Chris about having to go for a screen test — I said I had a family emergency. And as soon as I said ‘It’s a family emergency,’ he said, ‘You’re doing the Batman audition, aren’t you?’” Family emergency? The patron saint of playing hooky from work? Pretty weak excuse, if you ask us, given Pattinson’s tenured history of bizarre and fully realized lies.