Petition to make Ziwe Fumudoh a permanent co-host on Watch What Happens Live With Andy Cohen. Case in point: the comedian and “Baited on Instagram Live” host’s priceless reactions while ex-Housewife Brandi Glanville talks about her fling with newly departed Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast member Denise Richards. When Cohen asks Glanville why she spoke about Richards’s sex life to the other Housewives, Glanville says, “My off-camera life is the same as my on-camera life,” and also that she “was a little bit pissed at her.” Fumudoh nods along like it’s a Noam Chomsky lecture. Glanville counters Richards’s claims that she didn’t have a relationship with Glanville by saying, “We were definitely friends, and more than friends, actually.” Fumudoh does the thinky-emoji face. Glanville goes on to tell the story of the time she hooked up with Richards, and it is a romance for the ages:
The first night I met Denise, we made out in the bathroom. She asked to see my tits, because she said she had to get her boobs redone. We went into the restroom, she threw me against the wall, we were making out. But we were wasted, and it was fun, and I’m down for fun! And then she invited me away to her set, and we fucked, and that was it.
Ah, yes, the classic “Can I see your boobs, make out with you, and sleep with you strictly for surgical research?” trick. Glanville also definitely says she’s never slept with anyone else on the cast: “I think they’re all beautiful, but it never happened. It’s just blatant lies. It would have to be Rinna or Kyle, and it wasn’t either of them. And if I could choose, I would pick Erika.” Take note, Countess. This is how you play “F, Marry, Kill.”