There are two things every woman has been dreaming about and planning since she was a little girl: her first wedding and her first time entering the Bachelor mansion. On this week’s Two Friends: A Nice Time Hanging Out With People Who Know Each Other Well Arden Myrin, whose book Little Miss Little Compton just came out, and Lauren Lapkus, co-host of the Newcomers podcast, reconnected over Instagram and shared what they’ve planned for the day they are inevitably selected to enter those hallowed halls. But only after they got the most important business out of the way: unpacking the season premiere of The Bachelorette.
They were embarrassed for the straight-jacket guy, and they think maybe, if anything, Clare Crawley’s intentions are a little too pure (doesn’t she know the real end game is Instagram followers?) But if the producers of The Bachelor are reading this, please note that Myrin and Lapkus are ready for their limo debuts. Myrin already has a hot-pink high-low (or as she calls it “a mullet”) dress picked out for the occasion, while Lapkus is planning to opt for a fully casual look and be as nonchalant as possible. “We would be the weird ones,” says Lapkus. “So maybe I come in just wearing a cute, but casual outfit with like a funny T-shirt that’s not too over the top.” And while we’re not saying ABC should definitely cast them, we will note that they have apparently been very good about quarantining during all this. So do with this information what you will!
Be sure to watch this whole episode for several appearances made by cats, and follow Vulture on Instagram for information on future episodes. And while I have you, don’t forget to buy your ticket to Vulture Festival, happening all next week right here on the ol’ interwebs.