‘Weekend Update’ Wishes President Trump a Very Lengthy Recovery

Feeding off the energy of Chris Rock’s opening SNL monologue, Colin Jost and Michael Che returned to their “Weekend Update” desk to skewer the news of President Trump’s coronavirus diagnosis. Let their debate begin: Is his positive test, followed by a helicopter trip to the Walter Reed medical center, objectively hilarious? “There’s a lot funny about this,” Che offered. “Maybe not from a moral standpoint. But mathematically, if you were constructing a joke, this is all the ingredients you need. The problem is it’s almost too funny. Like it’s so on the nose. It would be like if I were making fun of people who wore belts and my pants just immediately fell down.”

“Is anyone surprised by this?” Che asked. “I honestly thought Trump was trying to get coronavirus. I thought it was like Groundhog Day when Bill Murray couldn’t die and was just trying anything. So all of those maskless rallies Trump was having, that was him being safe? Look, I don’t want the president to die, obviously. Actually, I wish him a very lengthy recovery.” Jost, meanwhile, noted the get-well-soons Trump has been receiving from both sides of the political aisle, even if Trump’s tweets make it seem like he’s mixing MDMA with hydroxychloroquine. “It’s been very weird to see all these people who clearly hate Trump come out and say we wish him well,” he added. “I think a lot of them are just guilty that their first wish came true.”