horny for santa

Caroline Polachek Serenades Santa in ‘So Cold You’re Hurting My Feelings’

Caroline Polachek just put the “carol” in Caroline Polachek. On December 21, the formerly-of-Charlift solo artist released a Christmas track called “So Cold You’re Hurting My Feelings,” which puts a festive spin on her 2019 single “So Hot You’re Hurting My Feelings.” Polachek swaps “Hot” for “Cold” and suddenly her catchy love song is an even catchier Christmas love song. Whereas the original music video implied that she’s singing for Satan in some fiery level of Hell, Polachek’s Christmas version of the song sees her moving on from Satan to Santa, with “ho ho ho” noises and lyrics about how “you’re out there riding the sleigh” and “you know I live for the tinsel.” This holiday self-parody is an absolute lay-up, but Polachek elevates it beyond the easy joke with some new, Christmas-y production, filling the track with new tinkly, cheery bells and synths. The track is part of a holiday mixtape from PC Music, with proceeds going to Trussell Trust food bank. To quote one of the YouTube comments on the music video, “I can’t believe Caroline invented hot and cold what a queen.”

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