Colbert’s current report? Go outside and get freaky, because who cares. During an interview with Normal People and chain star Paul Mescal on Wednesday, Stephen Colbert began a slow slide into an existential abyss when he noted, while recapping the show’s proclivity for depicting a lot of “pale, pale, Irish” sex, that “no one has ever asked me to do a nude scene” throughout his career. (A real missed opportunity when he appeared as a hot priest on The Mindy Project, if you ask us.) And you know what? Colbert won’t put up with Mescal’s “typically very private” conceptions about the art of boning, either. “We don’t want to kink-shame anybody out there who wants to fuck in the middle of the street,” a giggly Colbert responded. “That’s whatever; we’re all adults. Okay?” As always, please watch for cars and birds.