Comedian and goddamned movie star Patti Harrison dropped by last night’s episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live to promote her new movie Together Together, but she also took the time to address a very important situation. In case you missed it, Harrison got banned by Twitter in late February after she pulled a Jaboukie and switched her (verified) display name and photo to make it look like she was the official Nilla Wafers account, which she used to wade into and destroy the discourse that started when the Oreos account tweeted “Trans people exist.” Basically, Harrison pretended to be a man who claimed to be the singer Sia who was taking over the Nilla Wafers account for the day, tweeting out things like “There are only two genders” and “If you are bisexual, we do not want your business.” You’re following this, right?
Anyway, while on Jimmy Kimmel Live, Harrison decided it was time to apologize to the people she hurt with the stunt. “Bisexual people who love Nilla Wafers, I’m sorry if it was so decontextualized. A lot of times if you read a joke on the internet, it can be decontextualized, so maybe you didn’t know that a queer person made the joke and there is some agency there,” she said. “But if you saw that without that context, it was probably really painful to read that your favorite cookie hates you and doesn’t want your business. So I’m saying I take full responsibility for that. I’m sorry to you, bisexual people. Keep rockin’ both ways.” Thankfully, getting banned from Twitter hasn’t been all bad for Harrison. “What’s been nice about me getting banned and Trump also getting banned at the same time is now we have more time to hook up more,” she said. “I let our relationship — our sexual relationship — be a model for other people to put down their phones and have sex as much as me and Donald Trump do.” Truly an inspiration.
