bachelor nation

The Bachelorette Is Just Recycling Seinfeld Scripts at This Point

We were all collectively transported back to 1992-era Monk’s on Monday’s episode of The Bachelorette, with Katie Thurston declaring to her contestants that “little friendly handshakes with themselves are off limits” for as long as possible as a means of proving their devotion. Should they master their domain — er, sorry, we’re dealing with millennials — “withhold their self-cafe for as long as possible,” that’s a good thing in the eyes of the famously horny Thurston. But she’ll still “make it hard for them” (quite the opposite, actually) throughout the episode, which begins by sending co-host Kaitlyn Bristowe to deliver the sex-negative decree. “I’m going to fill you in on a juicy secret, and it’s called Operation WOWO: Week off, wank off,” Bristowe tells the guys. “Katie wants to see which one of you can hold out.” All that’s missing is a Kennedy and a sponge bath for a contest trifecta.

The Bachelorette Is Recycling Seinfeld Scripts at This Point