romantic simulations

Elon Musk and Grimes Took the Red Pill and Broke Up

Photo: Jason Kempin/Getty Images

Grimes and Elon Musk, a very real human couple from this planet who had been dating for more than three years, have broken up. “Page Six” first reported the news, with Musk confirming their separation to the outlet. “We are semi-separated but still love each other, see each other frequently, and are on great terms,” he explained. “It’s mostly that my work at SpaceX and Tesla requires me to be primarily in Texas or traveling overseas and her work is primarily in L.A. She’s staying with me now and Baby X is in the adjacent room.” Last May, the duo welcomed their first child, just as the prophecy foretold, and named him X Æ A-Xii, because of … aircraft reasons. Grimes previously admitted that she “sacrificed her power” to be with Musk, as he continues to do things like dress up in Wario cosplay and convince us that dogecoin is a thing. We just checked on Tesla’s market value and, don’t worry, everything looks fine.

Elon Musk and Grimes Took the Red Pill and Broke Up