Texas Chainsaw Massacre 4 star Matthew McConaughey released a three-minute video not announcing his run for Texas governor. Or announcing his non-run, depending on how you want to look at it. McConaughey explained that he had been listening and learning a lot, and would continue to invest in entrepreneurs and organizations he believes in, but will not be seeking office at this time. The video was full of platitudes about investing in our children, how enterprise is at the heart of the American Dream, and how we lead by serving. And helping others ultimately helps ourselves. It was a right pretty speech, but one that felt achingly familiar to Treehouse of Horror fans. Let’s see how well you paid attention to the Man Who Would Not Be Governor.