Hello Dillon Francis. We at Vulture see that you walked the Grammys red carpet in Las Vegas Sunday night with a Walgreens bag. The bag contained Entenmann’s Little Bites, with the box oriented to face the camera. You also held up your Grammys ticket, as if to say “Yeah, I know I’m carrying groceries and I didn’t iron my shirt, but I promise you I belong here!” This a very goofy, silly, fun photo op, and thank you for that. We just have some follow-up questions. It won’t take more than a few minutes, and then you can get back to innovating in the moombahcore sphere.
1. Is this spon?
2. No really, is Walgreens or maybe Entenmann’s paying you for this? Because we hate when what looks like a casual disregard for the fanciness of an evening turns out to actually be yet more commerce.
3. Did you know that Charles E. Entenmann recently died? He, his mom, and his brothers founded Entenmann’s and he was the last to go.
4. Do you think Charles E. Entenmann’s middle name was “Entertainment” like Chuck E. Cheese — or is that just a coincidence?
5. But seriously is this paid promotion?
6. Where is the closest Walgreens to the MGM Grand, and did you go through the casino to get to the red carpet?
7. You really didn’t have time to steam your shirt?
8. What else did you get?
9. With whom are you sharing those bites, and can we have some?
Thank you for your time.