Kara and Guillermo have mostly been boring this season, but I warmed up to them in “Last Sip Single.” They’re a beautiful couple, and their wedding was perfect. Guillermo’s excitement and his tribute to his brother were so moving, and it’s obvious he really loves Kara, despite her flaws. Does Kara love Guillermo? Yes! But not in the same way! She can’t help but correct Guillermo during his vows, but Guillermo has decided to say yes to her condescending attitude forever, and I’m happy for them.
They try to create some drama in Kara’s drinking, but she is chill for the entire event. Her dress is gorgeous (although the hair made it look a little too Betty Boop). Maybe Kara will chill out after the wedding, but either way, the couple we all knew would end up married got married. With Kara and Guillermo out of the way, we can focus on the remaining actual train wrecks in the show!
I thought Shaeeda would stand firm in her convictions and leave Bilal. Instead, she decides to manipulate the Master Manipulator. She tells Bilal she’ll sign the prenup no matter what, and suddenly Bilal gives her everything she wants. It’s not the Cinderella story she wanted, but Shaeeda describes a life of manipulating her husband into doing what she wants as the neck of her family. Fine! If that’s what you choose, Shaeeda! These two are definitely going to get married now, even if Bilal does not deserve it. The man yelled at her for not letting the fish thaw long enough. I do not know what she sees in him!
Kobe and Emily are the next couple reluctantly making their way down the aisle. Emily is mad that Kobe told his friend about the pregnancy. She’s mad that Kobe is making plans for the future, like moving to a city with an actual black population. It feels like Emily assumes she knows better than Kobe about everything. It’s starting to feel (more) racist! Kobe is a smart guy who can make choices. Did Emily think he’d come to America and she’d just boss him around and pop out his babies? Kobe looking toward the future only proves he wants to make things work with Emily. Also? Everyone looks at Zillow apartment listings! It’s not weird he looked at the average rent where his friend lives. Emily isn’t mature enough to be in this relationship if she doesn’t understand random Zillow browsing.
Mohamed runs to his mommy this week to get some advice and is shocked when she takes Yve’s side. I mostly suspect his mom doesn’t want to go back to cooking his meals, but it’s nice to see someone finally hold Mohamed accountable. I don’t think Mohamed’s second proposal came from a place of love as much as it resulted from his mom reminding him to stay on track. Mohamed still just seems focused on his green card, but Yve will definitely be distracted from that by pretty flowers for another week. Yve, he still isn’t going to have kids with you!
Even though the producers tried hard to give Thais the “I’m leaving” edit, it turns out she’s just headed to Boston! Patrick introduces Thais to his mom and sister, and they all seem to get along. His family is worried Thais will have Patrick’s baby and take it back to Brazil, but Thais does not look like she’s even thinking about children. That is not her priority, so I don’t think they need to worry about that. Overall, I think it’s good Thais is connecting with people in Patrick’s family other than John. She doesn’t have to go wedding-dress shopping alone, and hopefully she feels a little less homesick. Also, that dress was made for her!
Other than Kara and Guillermo, Miona and Jibri are the only two who get what they want this week. After all the arguing, they finally move out of Jibri’s parents’ house. Miona can’t stop smiling, and Jibri’s parents hate it! Of course Miona won; she knows where to buy matching hot pink winter coats for her and her man! I think we all know Jibri’s parents will not miss that wedding, but they had to give Miona and Jibri something to do this week.
With one wedding down, it looks like everyone is headed to the altar. That might be a 90 Day record. It’s just sad that two of the relationships are only happening because children are involved. And two people just feel like they’ve put in too much time to end a relationship that doesn’t fulfill them. At least I feel like all these couples would have great drama on Happily Ever After.
90 Day Notes
• Bilal’s mom really broke it down and I agreed with everything she said about trust. I even liked that Bilal said he doesn’t expect submission from his wife!
• Shaeeda, he doesn’t want to have your children!
• John staying home to watch the dog is such great big-brother stuff!
• I hope Patrick’s sister is okay! That black eye looked really bad, but it all felt very Boston. I obviously need to see John and his mom interact with those Boston accents.
• Mohamed’s mom does not want him back in her house; she told him to work it out!
• Miona got what she wanted!
• I cannot believe Emily broke into Kobe’s iPad and stormed off to talk to him about a Zillow listing. You can’t live in your parents’ house forever, Emily! Kobe moved across the world; you can’t move a few states over? Kobe is working in your dad’s barn, and you doubt his commitment?
• Kara and Guillermo are so horny for each other!
• No Ari and Bini this week, and things are noticeably more boring.