It’s easy to complain about the men of 90 Day Fiancé. Most of them have no idea what they’re doing, or they lie, or they simply aren’t ready for the pressures of marriage. “Man Up or Shut Up” shows some of this season’s worst guys finally “manning” up (or at the very least, no longer being as ridiculous). Perhaps the two best examples this episode are the Michaels (Angela and Natalie’s).
Mike and Natalie are two people who should not be together. They’re constantly one-upping each other in a weird passive-aggressive game. They fight over Mike’s mom again, so Natalie secretly leaves for her surgery without telling Mike. Mike goes to the hospital to look for her and when he finds their car, he decides to just take it and drive away. He doesn’t go into the hospital or try to figure out if they can tell him what’s going on. He just takes his giant blue truck and leaves!
Until he doesn’t. After a few moments on the road and telling Natalie she’d have to find her own way back to Sequim after her surgery, Mike realizes he’s acting like an ass. He turns around and goes back to the hospital. For Mike, this is growth. He didn’t play into Natalie’s plan to victimize herself. It’s clear Natalie has wanted to play the helpless wife to a husband who doesn’t care, but Mike does care! She kept him out of the loop at every step and disappeared the day of surgery! She’s trying to manufacture drama with him, and he almost fell for it. Maybe helping Natalie through the healing process will help these two communicate better.
Our other Michael did a lot more than what’s right, he actually stood up for himself! Michael has apparently been desperate to reach out to Angela since telling his friends he still loves her. Angela’s daughter convinces her to call and it goes exactly how you would expect: Michael barely says anything and Angela just starts screaming. You almost see the love leave Michael’s eyes and all-consuming exhaustion just take over. He is tired of this woman and their fights. But instead of yelling back or hanging up, he laughs! I could tell that hurt Angela more than his anger. He simply doesn’t take the situation seriously anymore. I think Angela’s daughter is right, Michael realized Angela would rather spend money on her makeover than on a surrogate, and his wants in the relationship don’t matter.
Of course, this double standard was obvious to anyone watching the show, or really anyone who has spent five minutes watching Angela on TV. It’s her way or the highway. She can cuss, you can’t. Angela just wanted Michael to come to America so he could take care of her brood of grandchildren and do what she says. I hope he’s finally free.
I understand this next sentence may shock some of you readers, but this week … I am firmly on Team Andrei. Andrei certainly never has a problem standing up for himself, but it’s usually overly defensive. This week, though, Libby’s family actually kinda deserves his harsh treatment. First of all, everyone is still stuck with this horrible RV idea, which leaves them stuck in D.C. when Libby doesn’t realize you can’t easily park an RV in D.C. This brings on the first situation Andrei controls with ease. Everyone is screaming about the Airbnb and where to pull over, and he simply makes an executive decision to get the hell out of D.C.
Libby tries to say it’s not her fault, but sorry girl, it is! Of course the person trying to rent their house for a few days is going to lie! It’s your job to get the address and look on Google Maps to check the parking situation! Even after Andrei gets them to a hotel safely, they still want to yell at him for Libby’s bad planning. I was happy to see Libby’s brother-in-law take Andrei’s side, but of course this moment of family bonding is short-lived. Andrei can’t help but go too far in front of Libby’s extended family and another fight breaks out when everyone remembers Andrei straight up asked Chuck for $100,000. Never man down, Andrei.
You know who else also finally became a man this week? Brandon! He actually got Julia off the farm and into a very small apartment with few windows. Of course, his parents hate it, but it’s perfect for them. Frankly, these two are probably only going to get more boring without the farm, but I love to see a 90 Day Fiancé man make a promise and keep it.
We get a little moment with Kalani and Asuelu this week that shows us their rock-throwing recommitment ceremony may not have been very successful. Asuelu tells Kalani he expects them to have more kids, which I don’t think is on the mind of a woman who saw a divorce attorney only a few weeks ago. I imagine Asuelu wants more kids because he is essentially a kid himself and wants people to play with, not because he is thinking about the money, logistics, or responsibility involved. To make matters worse for the couple (but great for people who love drama), Asuelu’s family lets him know they want to come visit. Asuelu’s mom and sister have literally tried to hit Kalani, so I don’t think this is what their newly stable relationship needs.
Now, let’s talk about the man we can all still complain about: Ronald. Ronald still has no interest in truly growing up to support his family. Does he make responsible choices at the Christmas store? No, he overspends and buys flashy stuff because he thinks it’ll make them stay. He can play Good Dad for a day in front of his mom, but is still so insecure in their relationship he can’t even stomach the idea of Tiffany asking his mom to watch the kids so they can talk. He immediately assumes Tiffany trash talked him when that isn’t the case! It’s like he’s constantly looking for fights and buttons to push while Tiffany is just trying to be a wife and mother. That Christmas tree isn’t going to keep your family in South Africa, Ronald, but being a responsible dad might!
90 Day Notes
• Jovi and Yara are back together this week!!!! Their airport reunion was so sweet. I hate anyone who calls Yara a gold digger when she so clearly loves that goofy man and his horrible work schedule. I’m sure he’ll get used to his new apartment. No notes for my favorite couple.
•The guy at the car dealership actually walked away when the conversation got awkward, which doesn’t normally happen on the show. Good for him.
•I really want to know what Natalie would’ve done if she came out to that parking lot and their car was gone.