90 Day Fiancé
“Into Your Arms” is a wonderful symphony of chaos. Brandon, Julia, and his parents aren’t around to provide any sort of stability, so we really get to enjoy this season’s wildest couples. Let’s just start with Stephanie, who seems like she’s teetering near the edge of a complete breakdown. Stephanie is no longer with Ryan, but his family is contacting her to locate him. She couldn’t care less and tells her assistant to block them while she moves ahead with her relationship with Harris.
It’s hard to feel bad for Stephanie when she orders Harris around like a cabana boy to make arrangements for them. Harris obviously doesn’t have genuine feelings for her, but he gives Stephanie the attention she wants. That being said, I do feel bad for Stephanie because it’s clear she’s using Harris and alcohol to deal with her feelings over Ryan. Maybe she was ready to let go of their relationship, but she was still subjected to a traumatizing experience when he lied about using a condom. I feel like her friends and the producers should be stepping in to tell her to get help, but people keep filling her wineglass to the brim instead. Stephanie was shit-faced when Harris said he loved her.
I still admire Stephanie for having an on-call psychic, though. And unlike Ryan, Harris is smart enough to play it cool and be nice. Always make a good impression on your girl’s psychic! If you do, she’ll ignore the giant red flags about your baby mama who you’re clearly still sleeping with. Also, Harris straight-up says he was looking to be hired as Stephanie’s American bodyguard and landscaper, which doesn’t sound like true love to me, but Stephanie’s psychic is impressed.
Stephanie might be spiraling this episode, but everyone else is making amazing decisions. Let’s all cheer: Natalie and Mike are finally done! Even though it seemed like their wedding was inevitable, at the last second, Mike decides he can’t go through with it. Natalie is understandably angry. Mike knew weeks ago he wasn’t going to marry that girl and should’ve sent her home before going through with couples therapy and choosing a date. Mike is a coward for waiting until the last minute to end things, but I’m just glad he did it! So many 90 Day couples end up going through with their weddings because they feel like they don’t have a choice at this point, and Mike didn’t care at all!
At this point, they’re both incredibly frustrating. Mike deserves to have his things thrown and Natalie never really loved him anyway. The only hero in this story is Mike’s neighbor, who agrees to give Natalie history’s most awkward ride to the airport.
Rebecca also makes some big decisions, but unlike Mike, she’s still feeling uncertain. She agrees to Zied’s timeline and cuts their engagement period from 60 days to eight. Zied promises they’ll have a big, beautiful Tunisian wedding after quarantine, but Rebecca knows this isn’t something they can actually afford. Zied is still unemployed. Rebecca compromises and makes it very clear that she’s unhappy, but Zied doesn’t seem to care. He’s made compromises too and is obviously unhappy without his family. Resentment isn’t a great foundation for marriage. Rebecca must really regret purchasing that PlayStation now.
Hazel and Tarik were already off on the wrong foot, but Tarik seemed to get his act together. Hazel has outlined clear rules for their open marriage and all he has to do is follow them. She doesn’t want him to date women from Thailand. She doesn’t want Tarik to talk to his ex and women she doesn’t know. So what does Tarik do? He wears a shirt with the country of Thailand on it and keeps flirting with a female online friend he’s never met. I’m glad Tarik’s friend takes Hazel’s side, because Tarik really doesn’t seem to understand at all how he’s breaking boundaries. He still goes on about how “technically” he wasn’t wrong when he absolutely was wrong. An open marriage doesn’t mean you get to do whatever you want. Earlier this season, Tarik and Hazel made a promise not to hurt each other and Tarik apparently forgot all about that.
In addition to celebrating the end of Mike and Natalie, I did a standing ovation when Andrew revealed Amira didn’t get on her flight to America. Andrew’s gross, manipulative behavior is so obvious. He only tells his mom half the story. He never really listens to Amira’s concerns. He can’t take any accountability for what happened to her in Mexico (the whiny way he says, “You’re blaming me for Mexico, baby,” haunts me). Meanwhile, Amira is dealing with riots surrounding her hotel during peak quarantine conditions. She can barely find food and is inundated by police sirens. It’s like she finally realized any man who would put her through this can’t really love her. On top of that, Andrew is suddenly trying to rush this conversation about kids when they clearly have other issues to focus on. I hope Amira realizes Andrew isn’t worth any of this and has the romantic love story she deserves in France.
And finally, there’s Yara and Jovi, who I had to save for last because this is an all-star episode for her in terms of quotable moments. From the moment Jovi comes home drunk from the strip club and tries to get in bed wearing the same jeans a woman just grinded on, Yara has so many great moments. She doesn’t care that it’s her wedding day, she is unhappy with every decision Jovi has made. On top of breaking her bachelor-party rules, Jovi used Yara’s invitation to his mom to invite way more friends than Yara initially agreed to. The most annoying part is that Jovi doesn’t try to apologize. He doesn’t even act a little ashamed of ruining his fiancé’s wedding day. Yara really must love this man if she’s willing to put up with all of this. Jovi must know that, too, in order to go through with a wedding to a woman who tells him not to touch her on their wedding day.
90 Day Notes
• You know, I’ve been writing recaps on the 90 Day Fiancé franchise for two seasons now and just realized it might be great to put notes down here for you to enjoy! There were so many wild things I had to call out this episode!
• Are pigtails the hairstyle of choice for women who have realized their romantic relationships are crumbling around them?
• Rebecca and Zied finally have furniture!!!! They can’t get along, but at least they have a table to argue at together.
• It’s great that Tarik has friends who can slap some sense into him, but does Tarik know he can’t just propose every time he messes up?
• Honestly, a producer should’ve stepped in when Stephanie started calling Harris by Ryan’s name.
• I thought Brandon would win “Most Disinterested Fiancé,” but Zied’s “Let’s just wear jeans” takes the trophy.