I can’t say I have ever wanted to live in the Billions universe, and now that it’s a world where New York City is hosting the 2028 Olympics, it sounds like an absolute nightmare.
Mike Prince’s shady machinations to bring the Games to Manhattan conclude in triumph tonight, while Chuck’s relentless efforts to seek justice end in defeat. But that’s just because Chuck couldn’t secure proof of wrongdoing in time to prevent Colin Drache from slipping away like the “Vaseline watermelon motherfucker” (Dave Mahar’s words, not mine) he is.
Prince bribing a fake-IOC fixer like Drache — a highly suspicious wire transfer of $5 million popped up in an offshore account right as the New York win is announced — is only part of the billionaire’s intricate sprint to victory. Since he can’t provide shiny new subway cars, Prince spends much of “Napoleon’s Hat” playing a game of chicken with state and city officials over the next best thing: a dedicated express system to and from the Games. But it’s not until Taylor forges a dubious partnership with a ratings agency that clinches Mayor Thompson and Governor Sweeney’s support: Taylor sells the agency their crowdsourcing algorithm in exchange for an obscenely low MTA rating. As soon as Pat Kiernan — taking a break from his MCU appearances to do a Billions cameo — announces this investment-killing development, the mayor and governor have no choice but to back Prince’s latest subway plan.
I want to get back to Colin Drache for a second, though: You know you’ve crossed pretty damn far into the dark side when Wags, the king of debauchery, is warning you against the dangers of, to use Drache’s term, financial “inspiration.” The same guy who spends a good portion of the episode helping sex workers evade Chuck’s raids cautions Prince not to bribe Drache to get the Olympics, saying the billionaire will “wake up a very different person.” For all his hedonistic tendencies, we do know that Wags is aware of life’s limits, making me wonder if there will come a time when he can no longer back his current boss.
More likely, if Wags ever does betray Prince, it will be because he has been kept out of the inner, inner circle: In last week’s episode, there was an ambiguous exchange between Prince and Scooter, where they discussed the reason why Prince is so keen to groom Scooter’s nephew Philip. From what I could gather, Prince wants Philip to take over MPC one day — because he and Scooter are planning something even more monumental than the Olympics. What that is, we don’t know, but it’s so top secret that it’s apparently the reason why Scooter returned to his office with no questions asked when it became clear corruption was about to go down.
For now, what we do know is that on the surface, this Olympics play still appears to be, as Taylor observed, a grand romantic gesture from Prince to his wife, Andy. But what Prince sees as “romance” I see as another example of his desire to control everyone in his life, even the ones he loves. There are already tons of cracks in this scheme, like Andy noticing how the sketchy Indiana A&M “diversity scholarship initiative” Prince presents to Drache looks a lot like a bribe. Or how butt-hurt Prince is after he flies a Skyline chili dinner in from Cincinnati, only for Andy to reject it because she has dinner plans. The most telling moment, though, is when Prince remains willingly ignorant of what will happen when the host city is announced: Wherever the Olympics is held, Andy will need to train in the location, and if he’s serious about rekindling their relationship, that means he must fly to where she is, not the other way around. He thinks that kind of talk is irrelevant because the Games will be in New York and everything has worked out according to his specifications.
Regardless of Prince’s intentions, Chuck remains determined to uncover an illegal action behind the New York Olympic bid, with his first target being the COVID-safe bordello the faux IOC delegates visited a few episodes ago. Before the AG faces his BDSM past to track down the brothel’s new location, he’s forced to confront the unfair advantage his elevated position affords him from none other than his own deputy. Dave Mahar begins questioning Chuck’s myopic pursuit of the über-rich, because she observes that “only those with wealth have the privilege of resenting it.” Dave may have done well in her career, but she didn’t have the kind of entrée into success that having the name Rhoades allowed, giving her no choice but to build her life on hard work. Though her mention of taking “the shortest maternity leave on record at the defender’s office” was a nice dig at the career risks women face in this country if they dare take extended time off after having a child. Chuck holds fast to his argument that people like Mike Prince are a direct threat to democracy, but Dave does well to remind him that taking down one billionaire doesn’t change an entire system.
Chuck forges ahead with his bordello search, not without revealing to Dave — and the audience — that he’s no longer engaging in BDSM. No reason is given, though maybe the pandemic caused an involuntary abstinence. But since Chuck is the only person in his office with contacts who can provide a clue, he arranges a meeting with his former domme, Troy, in her dungeon. Obtaining the bordello’s new address (and password) proves to be easy for Chuck. Resisting Troy and her pleas to return as a paying customer is much harder, especially when she gives his ear a fierce yank.
That evening, Chuck, Dave, and a team of state police raid the bordello, only to find a large group of beautiful young women playing bridge with a few scattered gentlemen. Chuck and Dave immediately gather that they’ve been tipped off, and their suspicions are confirmed by a phone call between Wags and a familiar-looking sex worker who was writing her dissertation when last we saw her.
By the time Chuck has the proof to implicate Colin Drache, it’s too late. He leads the same team of state police to Mike Prince’s swanky brownstone, where the New York 2028 Olympic Committee is celebrating its win under a firework-lit sky. While Prince, Andy, and members of the MPC team wave to the crowd from the stoop, Drache uses the chaos of the moment to slither away. No matter, as Chuck is already planning his next move: Cutting Prince off from his “power base.”
What will likely work in Chuck’s favor with that strategy is, even though Prince has “won,” he’s still operating from a place of vulnerability. Just when he thought he’d succeeded in getting Andy back under his thumb, she turns the tables on him, announcing that she needs to leave immediately for training in Denver. She reminds him that he did promise to fly anywhere she needs him to be, which really shouldn’t be a hardship because money grows out of his ass and he has his own jet. But no, instead of working out a realistic plan with the woman he loves, Prince whines about how “the work falls on me again,” obtusely thinking that training for a sport-climbing gold medal somehow happens while Team USA’s coach lounges around in a Manhattan townhouse. Although Andy gives a fantastic argument for why it’s her husband’s turn to do the work and “climb for the kiss,” you can tell, despite Prince agreeing to her terms, he is not happy about it.
Loose Change
• Chuck ever so subtly channeling Julianne Moore when discussing scholarship candidates is hands down the best Big Lebowski reference ever made onscreen. Don’t @ me.
• The hinted rekindling of Chuck and Wendy’s relationship was a nice red herring, but getting them back together is just a bad idea all around. I’m sure their babysitter is exceedingly grateful that their renewed mutual disdain netted her a private dinner with chef Daniel Boulud.
• However, it was fun to see Chuck and Wendy shut down that insufferable dad bro.
