overnights

Never Have I Ever Recap: Saving Face

Never Have I Ever

…made someone jealous
Season 3 Episode 4
Editor’s Rating 4 stars

Never Have I Ever

…made someone jealous
Season 3 Episode 4
Editor’s Rating 4 stars
Photo: Lara Solanki/Netflix

The fourth episode opens by speeding through Devi’s phases of breakup grief. She rampages! She wallows! And after several months, she accepts the situation. Suddenly we’re in the fall of a brand-new school year, and Devi’s finally feeling good, at peace, back to normal. That is till she hears that Paxton has a new girlfriend, Phoebe Hayward — whom Devi reflexively calls Handjob Hayward before apologizing for her feminist falter. (“It’s interesting how women can’t rage without thinking about it in the context of other people’s oppression,” notes our rageaholic narrator.)

Despite this bombshell news, Devi can’t dwell on it too much. Nirmala is throwing a party that evening for Navaratri. In the first season, we saw the Vishwakumars celebrate Ganesh Puja, and now this; the show does a nice job of showing that there are indeed Hindu holidays other than Diwali (which Mindy Kaling also helped introduce to broader American audiences years ago through The Office). Devi might not know much about the origins of Navaratri (Fabiola can provide an enthusiastic textbook definition), but she knows she must be a good, dutiful granddaughter — which means she’ll miss Trent’s birthday rager that same night.

Paxton assumes Devi’s not going to Trent’s party because of his new relationship status and he tries to apologize in case it hurts her. But Devi brushes it off and claims she’s been talking to “loads of guys.” Paxton notes that she doesn’t seem ready to have an honest conversation about things … and I feel like this is fair! Given her minimal dating experience, of course, she might be taking longer or feeling emotionally shakier than him! Nevertheless, Eleanor and Fabiola tell Devi she needs to show up to Trent’s party, if only to convince Paxton that she isn’t still sad and pining for him.

Cut to the Navaratri prep. As the Vishwakumar ladies wait for the guests to arrive, Devi admires Nirmala’s Golu — an artistic display of idols and figurines, complete with a DIY Sanjay Gupta and a little brown bag from Bloomingdales to symbolize the “American Dream.” Nirmala’s still Team Anybody but Manish, telling Kamala she needs to find a man who actually gives a damn about their culture. So, to prove Nirmala wrong, Kamala asks Manish to show up to the soirée, clad in a kurta and essentially having memorized Hinduism for Dummies.

While at the party, Eleanor sends Devi a photo of Phoebe in a teensy top. I do not at all understand why — does Devi really need to see that? But it serves its purpose: Devi’s even more determined to make it there. And right on cue, Manish shows up, giving Devi a potential out. As Manish gets interrogated by aunties, Devi heads upstairs to change into a cute outfit and escape to Trent’s. Unfortunately, Nalini catches Devi as she straddles her window sill, about to sneak out. Busted!

Nalini finds someone else outside the house, too: Rhyah on the front steps, looking glum. Turns out she just got off the phone with her son Nirdesh, whose friends iced him out despite his recent return from high school at sea. So Nalini pulls a 180 and decides Devi can go to Trent’s party, as long as she invites Rhyah’s kid.

Devi’s not keen on the idea and makes a lame joke about his name (“That sounds like a parody of an Indian nerd”) but ultimately agrees if it’s her only way out. Before he arrives, she tells everybody at the party that Nirdesh is her cousin — a lie she quickly regrets upon realizing he’s a stone-cold hottie.

Back at the house, Manish is on a winning streak until he mistakes Bloomie’s bag from the Golu for trash. To make matters worse, he accidentally knocks Smita Auntie into the Golu, causing it and her (not to mention any chance of getting Nirmala’s blessing) to go crashing down. When Nirmala requests that Kamala not have Manish over again, Kamala says she understands — and will be moving out of the house accordingly.

At the party, Devi tries to explain to Nirdesh — Des for short, played by Anirudh Pisharody — the reason behind her lie but just digs herself into a deeper hole: “Let’s be honest. There’s a lot of nerdy Indian guys.” And rightfully, he pushes back with a far better read on her than vice versa: “It’s fine. I’ve met a million of you before. You’re one of those Indian girls who only likes white guys and thinks all Indian dudes are just computer geeks or cheesy club rats who wear too much cologne.”

What Des articulates is an unfortunately real, albeit under-discussed, dynamic that can exist in the diaspora. (I remember, during my first week of uni, I was scandalized when I met a fellow South Asian girl who joked about refusing to date FOBs: men who were “fresh off the boat.”) Devi obviously has a good heart and is not speaking out of malice (plus, we can chalk some of this posturing up to pure teenage insecurity and wanting to fit in). But this gnarly combo of self-hatred and condescension deserved a call-out, and I’m glad she was forced to reevaluate her words. (And for the record, this kind of inclination swings both ways gender-wise — there are way too many narratives in pop culture where brown men write off brown women while a white love interest is seen as the sexy Second Coming of Christ). Devi has had to gently consider her internalized racism and cultural shame before (namely in season one’s Ganesh Puja episode), but this instance feels way more direct and pointed.

Devi apologizes again and tries to convince Des to stay, but then she spots Paxton kissing Phoebe. Staying doesn’t feel so important anymore. Des follows Devi as she runs outside. After learning what set her off, he offers some optimism: “You survived. That was the worst it’s going to be.” Devi asks how he doesn’t have any friends, and Des explains that actually, only one of his friends isn’t talking to him, and it’s because Des (unknowingly) hooked up with a girl he liked. Devi’s clearly intrigued by this guy who’s clearly not a dork, not a jerk, and thankfully not her cousin.

He’s also not an idler; Des suggests they go back inside and make Paxton jealous. Des takes Devi by the hand, twirls her, and they dance together. Paxton’s eyes are on them, but their eyes are locked on each other. Devi’s crushing! And it seems like Des is too; as their night winds down, he asks if he can text her sometime. Cute, cute, cute.

Back outside of the house, a very drunk Ben and Fabiola are coming clean after their history-based drinking game. Fabiola apologizes for making him guzzle (i.e. lose) so much, and Ben says he understands why she doesn’t like him. Fabiola corrects Ben: She doesn’t dislike him, just how he’s treated Aneesa and, of course, Devi. “Yeah, well, she broke my heart,” Ben says about the latter. Fabiola’s taken aback by his drunken admission but agrees not to tell her friend. Man, these kids should be having fun and enjoying their youth, but instead, they’re so terrified of being vulnerable and pitied. Less saving face and more sucking face, please!

Extra Credit

• “So where should we put Sanjay? If he’s in the center, the Golu will be too sexy.”

• “Alright, cool it, WikiFeet.”

• Goddamnit is Nirmala ever funny. I think so far, she and Trent are neck and neck for comedy MVP this season based on line delivery alone! And did I mention how brutal she is? Devi describes one of Nirmala’s wisecracks in this episode as a savage burn, but they honestly all are. I’m convinced she needs to be on the dais for every future Comedy Central Roast.

• As much as I love Manish — his dedication to courting Kamala is endearing as hell — he does keep crashing Nirmala’s get-togethers! He’s that guy!

Never Have I Ever Recap: Saving Face